Girls Still Definitely Suck

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Girls Still Definitely Suck
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flag rosemarywheel
Posted: May 2, 2022 at 21:23 Quote
FloridaHasMTBToo wrote:
Ya know, this is gonna sound interesting, but I met this girl yesterday evening and we kinda hit it off and I got her number. Soooo it looks like I'm just gonna move on and try this out. All I gotta say is that yesterday was wild lol

Fab Fab Fab Mucho Bueno! One of my freinds just met this 21 year old welding gal at work he wants to introduce me to Razz Eek
flag road-psyclist
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 8:17 Quote
Just looking for insight from you all.

Unfortunately my girlfriend left me last night. Cry

We were in a long distance relationship for 2 years. She's in SD, USA.

We video called last week and we were loving and happy talking, then the next day, she started guilt tripping me and bringing up the past and kept making feel like a bad person all the way up until Thursday'ish.

I did make unintentional mistakes, but apologised about them when I became defensive. I remember apologising and telling her I was upset when I made unintentional mistakes during our relationship.

She brought up recently (with screenshots) showing how I love reacted to a female friends selfies and also screenshots of me saying dirty things about women on here which people uploaded, and told me it hurt her and made her jealous as she has body dysmorphia and she's insecure about her body and looks.

I owned up to that and apologised, but they're the only two things I did wrong (or how I feel).

She brought up my best friends, friend who tried wrecking our relationship because I talked to her and told my woman that she's actually a nice person after talking to her, and she got mad with me for saying it.

I had blocked one guy and 3-4 women for my woman straight away when she said they disrespected our relationship, because I wanted to make her happy and show I cared.

She suggested promise rings last year and I got my finger measure the day after and ordered a promise ring straight away and wore it straight away because I wanted women to think I was married when I went for walks through town. She took a while to get hers.

I rejected two women who hit on me in town and notified my woman that they did because I like to be honest and not hide things from her, and wanted to always be upfront.

I never cheated on her and never flirted with any women the whole 2 years and was loyal.

Just pointing out the good things too, so you all can give me your opinions.

Anyway. Is it just me? Or do you think she's projecting guilt, and guilt tripping me because she feels guilty for something she's done to me? Which I suspect is cheating.

She told me she slept around in her youngers years. She's in the USA and out of my sight, and along with knowing I'm a good guy (my Facebook friends have told me I am too) am I being paranoid, or do you think she may have cheated and is nit-picking excuses by bringing up my faults of the past as an excuse to make herself feel less guilty?

Just want clarification and opinions to help me ease my mind.

Feeling down and have cried a lot, but she pushed me away the past couple of years by getting angry with me over small and unintentional mistakes.

Thanks in advance for any opinions on the matter.
flag whattheheel
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 11:31 Quote
People from SD suck. Move on. lol
flag road-psyclist
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 11:46 Quote
whattheheel wrote:
People from SD suck. Move on. lol

lol - She didn't, but told me the same as you told me a few times.

I know moving on is my best option. She just left me wondering why she suddenly guilt tripped me when everything was going fine.
flag badbadleroybrown
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 12:51 Quote
The why doesn't matter... it never matters, and knowing will never actually make you feel any better.


If it floats, flies, f*cks, or drives... it's a depreciating investment, lease don't buy.

Time for something new Kinny.
flag RelapsedMandalorian
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 14:15 Quote
kinny-pb wrote:
Just looking for insight from you all.

Unfortunately my girlfriend left me last night. Cry

We were in a long distance relationship for 2 years. She's in SD, USA.

We video called last week and we were loving and happy talking, then the next day, she started guilt tripping me and bringing up the past and kept making feel like a bad person all the way up until Thursday'ish.

I did make unintentional mistakes, but apologised about them when I became defensive. I remember apologising and telling her I was upset when I made unintentional mistakes during our relationship.

She brought up recently (with screenshots) showing how I love reacted to a female friends selfies and also screenshots of me saying dirty things about women on here which people uploaded, and told me it hurt her and made her jealous as she has body dysmorphia and she's insecure about her body and looks.

I owned up to that and apologised, but they're the only two things I did wrong (or how I feel).

She brought up my best friends, friend who tried wrecking our relationship because I talked to her and told my woman that she's actually a nice person after talking to her, and she got mad with me for saying it.

I had blocked one guy and 3-4 women for my woman straight away when she said they disrespected our relationship, because I wanted to make her happy and show I cared.

She suggested promise rings last year and I got my finger measure the day after and ordered a promise ring straight away and wore it straight away because I wanted women to think I was married when I went for walks through town. She took a while to get hers.

I rejected two women who hit on me in town and notified my woman that they did because I like to be honest and not hide things from her, and wanted to always be upfront.

I never cheated on her and never flirted with any women the whole 2 years and was loyal.

Just pointing out the good things too, so you all can give me your opinions.

Anyway. Is it just me? Or do you think she's projecting guilt, and guilt tripping me because she feels guilty for something she's done to me? Which I suspect is cheating.

She told me she slept around in her youngers years. She's in the USA and out of my sight, and along with knowing I'm a good guy (my Facebook friends have told me I am too) am I being paranoid, or do you think she may have cheated and is nit-picking excuses by bringing up my faults of the past as an excuse to make herself feel less guilty?

Just want clarification and opinions to help me ease my mind.

Feeling down and have cried a lot, but she pushed me away the past couple of years by getting angry with me over small and unintentional mistakes.

Thanks in advance for any opinions on the matter.

Couple of things in there bro, a person can and only should ever seek to control three things; your thoughts, your behaviour and your actions.

When we seek to control more, especially of others it often indicates deeper rooted issues, usually around attachment. Case in point is someone asking you to 'block' friends, why are they seen as a threat? Often they're not but when someone is feeling out of control of themselves, rather than acknowledge that or put in the hard work to address issues (which is the common go to for people these days, make excuses 'it's my anxiety' or 'I have [insert self-diagnosed condition here]') , the easier option is to try to control their environment and those within it. But the effects are short lived because it's a placebo which wears off and has to be escalated to make the negative feelings subside.

There are no answers or closure because someone else's chaos is irrational and they can barely make sense of themselves so won't be able to give you the answers you seek.

You are better out of that dude, it would have got worse.
flag PACNW-MTB
O+
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 14:47 Quote
Solid advice as usual Mando.

kinny - Long distance relationships are hard. Much harder to figure out the why's of things. Don't stress over it, don't even need to figure out why. Feel the pain and move on. When one door closes, others always open. Hang in there bro, you are a good dude!
flag Reaperactual
Posted: Jul 9, 2022 at 22:21 Quote
Seems like your situation and way to proceed from here on has been very well explained already.

It's gonna be hard for a while as you already know, I'm sure it's not the first time you've gone through something like this.

No doubt the hardest but ultimately the best way forward like others have said is don't even try to get answers from the ex, cut it off, block her, zero contact, whatever.

Don't give her yet another opportunity to dish out and project her guilt onto you, let her live with the choices she made without being able to make your actions and friends the excuse from this point on.
flag road-psyclist
Posted: Jul 10, 2022 at 1:25 Quote
Thank you everyone. I appreciate the advice. I'll move on when I'm ready, but as you all probably know, heartbreak is a killer.

We were together for 2 years and it we were mostly happy, but her insecurities and jealousy wore me down, and she slowly pushed away me to the point of not being (partially) bothered if she left me, although it hurts now and I have been crying on and off.

I'll get over her. Both of my exes cheated and left me, so it's nothing new with being deserted. It's just that she felt like my first true love.

I was single since 2012 and planned on being single for the rest of my life until she added me on Fascistbook and opened up to me to the point of falling for her.

I'll stick to being single from now on. I'm better off alone and enjoy my solitude. I just need time to heal.

Salute Salute Salute
flag adm750
Posted: Jul 10, 2022 at 6:15 Quote
hey Kinny ! sorry to hear the news mate. All solid advice from the four gents in front of me.

hang in there man. it will suck for a bit, but you're blessed to have this shit go down now rather than after an life-changing event like either of you deciding to emigrate.

wish her well and move on. There's lots of life left to live brother, and plenty of birds out there who will see Mace as truly Amazing, Salute
flag road-psyclist
Posted: Jul 10, 2022 at 7:04 Quote
adm750 wrote:
hey Kinny ! sorry to hear the news mate. All solid advice from the four gents in front of me.

hang in there man. it will suck for a bit, but you're blessed to have this shit go down now rather than after an life-changing event like either of you deciding to emigrate.

wish her well and move on. There's lots of life left to live brother, and plenty of birds out there who will see Mace as truly Amazing, Salute

Thank you buddy. I'm slowly getting better. I went for a short bike ride earlier and cleared my mind a little.

I've wished her well and told her we can move on in our own separate ways.

I'll stay single for now. I was since 2012 until she opened up to me in early 2020 and we fell in love.

I was happy being single before that and enjoyed/enjoy my solitude and wish I kindly rejected her when she opened up to me, but I don't regret meeting her either. She helped me a lot and made a positive impact on my life.

I'll stick to being single for now, unless I meet a local woman who I can trust. I've had two previous relationships and they were nothing but headaches and endless problems, just the same with her.

Like this song says:
flag Dustndirt
Posted: Jul 10, 2022 at 9:29 Quote
You seem like a platinum dude kinny. Everone has covered it pretty well. I will add that each relationship should be a learning experience. You now know another sign to watch out for. Lasting relationships should not be hard. If your waisting your time with the wrong one, you will miss the right. It sucks, we have all been there. Try to get out or occupy your mind, wallowing alone makes it worse. You will find the girl kinney someday. Anecdotally, I dated a girl from San Diego that was just like her. Must be something in the water..
flag road-psyclist
Posted: Jul 10, 2022 at 9:47 Quote
Thanks dude. I go for a daily walk which helps. I'll go for rides every so often too. I'm starting to feel a little better. I just need time to heal, but I'll overcome the pain.
flag FloridaHasMTBToo
Posted: Jul 24, 2022 at 19:19 Quote
f*ck. I just fumbled the bag. So I was fishing this one pond in an apartment complex. Had my earbuds in, Waylon cranking. Minding my own business, just vibing and I hear a bunch of giggling and shit behind me so I just turn up my music and keep fishing. I was walking back to where I set my stuff and I take my earbuds out to focus on getting my shit fixed and I hear some girl say "hiiii" or whatever and it clicks that it was her and her friend who were giggling and trying to get my attention. For some reason I just f*cking kept walking. Idk why, I just did. How do I overcome this shitty awkwardness. I feel so f*cking stupid because my gf broke up with me and I was ready to move on and I just passed up my shot.
flag deli-hustler
Posted: Jul 24, 2022 at 23:54 Quote
FloridaHasMTBToo wrote:
f*ck. I just fumbled the bag. So I was fishing this one pond in an apartment complex. Had my earbuds in, Waylon cranking. Minding my own business, just vibing and I hear a bunch of giggling and shit behind me so I just turn up my music and keep fishing. I was walking back to where I set my stuff and I take my earbuds out to focus on getting my shit fixed and I hear some girl say "hiiii" or whatever and it clicks that it was her and her friend who were giggling and trying to get my attention. For some reason I just f*cking kept walking. Idk why, I just did. How do I overcome this shitty awkwardness. I feel so f*cking stupid because my gf broke up with me and I was ready to move on and I just passed up my shot.

You are only young, it will come. You will realise that you have to put your big boy knickers on, say f*ck it and just go for it!!!!

 
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