Round Up: The Best April Fools From the Cycling World

Apr 1, 2021
by James Smurthwaite  
We all need a bit of levity given the nightmare that has been the past 12 months. Thankfully, the cycling industry turning up the troll-o-meter and cranked out some quality gags to cheer us all up in this weird time. Here are all the best ones we've spotted:



Guerilla Gravity’s -10 degree headset



Sam Pilgrim launches a new shoe brand


bigquotesI've been working on my very own shoe brand for a long time and together with leading scientists we've created the most organic material ever in a shoe. I've created what I think is the greatest mountain biking shoe ever made. Take a look at what I came up with. The Dino claw grip is incredible! I'm so proud to introduce it!Sam Pilgrim



IFHT's Once-Daily Bikes by Trek


bigquotesHave you lost the spark in your life? Is the magic gone? Try all-natural, fast-acting Once-Daily Bikes by Trek. Seriously delightful side effects may occur. Bikes do not require a prescription and are available at your local Trek retailer now.



Ruckus Composites to retail new 'Space Adventure Shovel'

Today, Ruckus Composites, a highly reputed carbon fiber repair company, announced that they will be starting sales of their new “Space Adventure Shovel” After years of extensive research and development Ruckus is excited to release a product that will serve adventurous terranauts traveling to our rusty red neighbor, Mars. Made from aerospace-grade titanium and designed with input from renowned mad engineers the “Space Adventure Shovel” will be able to stand up to the rigors of space travel and planetary exploration.


Commenting on the product release, founder and lead designer Shawn Small said, “With travel increasing to Mars we saw a need for products that help adventurers follow Leave No Trace practices while out recreating their favorite scenes from the Martian or visiting early rover landing sites. Our hope is that SAS will help keep our cosmic neighborhood clean and free of human contaminants long into the future. Today we are elated to be at the forefront of space exploration and furthering the cause to make humans interplanetary!”


The Space Adventure Shovel features:

- Grade 9 aerospace titanium
- A compact, slim profile that fits in most retail space suit pockets
- Antimicrobial coating to facilitate sanitary storage
- Weighted at exactly 42 grams
- Sold in a variety of colors and washes to compliment your space travel fashion themes
- “Leave No Trace In Outer Space!” ™

Available at SEI (Space Equipment, Inc) and select retailers today!



Cane Creek Announces eeWings DIY Titanium Crankset


Cane Creek Cycling Components is proud to announce the latest addition to our lineup of acclaimed eeWings Titanium cranks - the eeWings DIY. The eeWings DIY arrives in 9 individual unwelded pieces consisting of the same 3AL-2.5V and 6AL-4V titanium as the original eeWings crankset. The kit can then be assembled and welded by the rider - at home or wherever you have advanced welding equipment.

bigquotes“We were really thinking about all of those riders out there doing full shock service at home. We figured if they have things like oil fill machines and compressed nitrogen in their garage, they probably also have tig welders and would prefer to weld their own cranks.” Luke Bukoski, Rider Engagement Director

Assembly of the eeWings DIY is simple. All that is required is a tig welder, a tank of argon gas, a titanium fill rod, protective equipment and advanced knowledge of technical welding.

"It's really straightforward,” said Brandon Blakely, Design Engineer at Cane Creek. “You just tig weld the joints using a titanium filler rod while purging Argon gas through the torch and back purging through the individual part to the backside of the weld. You do that to all of the joints ensuring a strong weld and then - bam - you’ve got a set of eeWings cranks."


The eeWings DIY are available for order on April 1 for $1499 with shipments expected to arrive to customers between June and August 2022.

*10-year warranty not available on eeWings DIY

Disclaimer: Welding just like mountain biking, is inherently dangerous. Failure to properly weld may result in injury then death. The durability, strength, appearance, and compatibility of eeWings DIY cranks will vary greatly depending on welding experience, patience, and tools available. Side effects of impersonating an expert welder include but are not limited to 1st thru 3rd degree burns, fire, oxygen deprivation, trouble breathing, loss of eyesight, blindness, and difficulty seeing. Be sure to protect yourself from yourself. Cane Creek is not responsible or liable for any eeWings DIY customer dissatisfaction – this one is on you. Instructions are sold separately but are currently unavailable. Ask your local bike shop if eeWings DIY are right for you... If you don’t have a proper or accurate source of information on bicycle products, consult the comment section on Pinkbike.com.

Read the full story, here.



Nukeproof's First-Ever Pedal Assisted Bike - The Scouter

The darkest winter nights have been encouraging the darkest of thoughts. The “slog“ of lapping heavy going British trails, brought on a new anger and envy at the electrical powered brethren’s. If you can’t beat them, join them?

"But how" you cry? Nukeproof don’t have an electrically powered bicycle… and we still don’t. We’ve bypassed electricity and gone straight back a bygone era. Please welcome our latest addition to the Nukeproof range; the Scout(er).


Designed and developed deep in the Black Country, UK. With over 3 months of tinkering, engineering and refining in the garden shed, it’s almost ready for the trails. Harnessing the power of an E-Bike, but with technology from a lost generation technology, a 2-stroke 80cc engine 3BHP motor. As with any new bike, you’ve got to bring in a new standard, so we’re pleased to introduce Super Mega Whopper Boost 168mm spacing (box ticked!).

Spec: A high performance fully compromised build resurrected from the scrap heap and spare parts box:

- Scout 275 XL Frame
- Rockshox Lyrik 170mm
- Nukeproof Finishing kit Inc. Custom Saddle (As unwanted by Sam Hill)
- Sam Hill Signature Super Throttle grip
- Hybrid No Hope Wheelset (Hope Pro 4 27.5 Rear/ Mavic Deemax Front)
- Tyres: Semi Slick Michelins
- Sram Code/ Guide mix ‘n match brakes
- Sam Hill Day of the Dead Hand Guards
- Super Mega Whopper Boost: 168mm Hub Spacing
- X01 11 Speed Drivetrain
- Fully customised plumbing
- Top Tube Mounted Hydration for incredible range
- 80cc eBay motor, creating 3bhp
- A LOT of re-engineering
- Near certain death.

SRP: £20,000*




Ninja Mount presents Ninja Disc in all-new Shrimanux Standard

So far, bikers have had to be content with the banal assembly of the brake disc with six M5 screws. Now the Ninja Disc comes with a completely new and well-thought-out fastening concept: the Shrimanux standard.

The brake disc of the future is attached using three M4 screws (inner bolt circle 33 mm), which saves a lot of weight. However, to ensure the usual stability and reliability, three M5 screws are used in the outer bolt circle (52mm). Here it becomes clear that the new standard was developed with a focus on sustainability because when changing to the new standard, the biker only has to purchase half of the screws and can fall back on existing M5 screws.

After a long puzzling over whether 220mm diameter is not too much of a good thing and whether 200mm is really enough, the Ninja Disc now comes with the optimal diameter of 213.8 mm. This diameter has proven to be the optimum between weight, air resistance and heat dissipation in the laboratory.

Advantages of the Shrimanux standard:
• Less arm pump
• Bike stays higher in the suspension travel
• Greater rigidity with less weight
• Modern geometry

Note: The corresponding brake adapter and the hubs with the Shrimanux standard can only be delivered at the end of April, as these parts were shipped with the Ever Given.

More information about Ninja Mount. Read the full story, here.



Robert Axle Project Launches an Electronic Thru Axle

The Robert Axle Project has eliminated the need for tools with the press of a button. Enter, the eRap Thru Axle, the world’s first self-threading and ejecting thru axle.

Simply line up the wheel, slide the axle into place and press the LED lit button. The axle will immediately come to life as the threads begin to spin and pull the axle the rest of the way into the frame, securing the axle to a precise 12nm (+/- 1%) thanks to the built-in torque sensor.

In addition to the increased convenience, RAP is touting an aerodynamic benefit of 0.5 watts due to the hex hole being replaced with a smooth button. For those riding at night, the orange LED ring increases side visibility.

eRap axles will retail for $420 for a pair. Orders are open now at robertaxleproject.com. Axles will begin shipping on 4/1/2021.

Read the full story, here.



Neutron Components launches alternative healing kits for mountain bikers

When we launched our ultralight first aid kit last year we thought we had everything covered… until we read the Pinkbike comments section. It turns out we'd got it all wrong! After literally hours of YouTube research we're happy to reveal two new first aid kits to carry with you on the trail.

To ensure our customers are covered for any type of injury, we’ve developed an ultralight homeopathy kit for the open-minded adventure junkie. To use the homeopathic first aid kit, simply take a sample of whatever has caused your injury (eg. rock, tree, bear) and add it to a vial of water. Dilute twice for minor grazes or up to four times for life-threatening injuries, then apply to the affected area.

The kit includes all of your homeopathic essentials:
• 2x glass vials for potion preparation
• 1 pair tweezers for sample collection
• 1 eye dropper to measure dosage

RRP $199. Water not included.

Read the full story, here.
Pushing the limits of science



VHS Tape's Silent 'Stealth Max' Tires

Views: 11,632    Faves: 19    Comments: 7


You ride bikes not only to have fun but to escape the world and get away from the hustle and bustle of day to day life, why ruin that with loud shralps? Get a grip in 2021 with our all new silent tyres! Kill fears not ears!

Certified ear level protection by all leading ear doctors. A rubber so silent the Government doesn't want you to have it!

Specifications:

- Sizes: 24, 26, 27.5, 29 and the all new 32er.
- Decibels: all tyres are -9.4 decibels.
- Compound: Full grip, Half Grip and No Grip options available.
- Bead: Yes
- Application: Best suited for mountain bikes
- Weight: 3-4 months.
- Max PSI: 69
- Tread: Never wares out, its a tyre for life.
- Only Tubeless Ready - Try our all new 'Silent Sealant' (tyres not compatible with tubes)

Instagram

More info, here.



Versus Bicycle Tires Announces the Recycled Roadie Jersey Rubber (RRJR) collection



Versus Bicycle Tires is proud to announce our Recycled Roadie Jersey Rubber (RRJR) collection.

We challenged ourselves to help rid the world of disgraced roadie jerseys. Working with international authorities, we searched pawn shops, the collections of questionable doctors, HGH facilities and backstreet dealers to acquire an assortment of disgraced roadie kits for our process.


"We're really excited about this" says Versus founder, Scott Hultgren, "we squeezed any excess chemicals from the garments before grinding them with premium quality rubber to create an optimal mix of roadie jersey & rubber worthy of our RRJR collection."

"These tires roll dope, it's like I can feel my segment wins inside them when I ride" said a famous roadie (speaking under condition of anonymity).



Versus x Grund ns PNW Winter Dig Jacket
Versus x Grund ns Bellingham Sombrero
The PNW Winter Dig Jacket and Bellingham Sombrero will be ready to rock next digging season.

Furthering the collection is Versus x Grundéns RRJR coated digging apparel. Made for the harshness of the PNW by harnessing the power of the roadie's KOMs.

For more information about the RRJR line of products or Versus Tires in general, visit versustires.com or follow them on instagram @versustires.com



GPX - Galloping Pedal Xtreme


GPX
Galloping Pedal Xtreme
With this setup. you have no choice but to yeeeehaw

On a mission to make mountain bikes even more efficient, we stumbled across a solution that was there all along!
The GPX. Nature developed it, SRAM manufactured it, Gira Sykkel, a small bike shop in Asker, Norway perfected it.

The brainchild of, Gavin Steder, GXP redefines pedaling performance.
Want to see how it performs? Click the video below.


Rider: Gavin Steder
Inventor: Gavin Steder
Bike: Revel Rascal - GPX Edition
Photo: Barbora Hollan
Production Assistant: Martin Vinje (Makes the best coffee)
Naturewalker 1: Martin Vinje



YT Reveals Rampage Ready Tues Corn Balance Bike


bigquotesToday is the day. Our brand new #TUES Corn is live now! It's time for some new Young Talent. YT




Reeb Cycles Solves Handlebar Alignment Problems Once And For All


bigquotesHandlebars. Something that every bike has. But have you ever had handlebars that made you a better rider? We’ve seen it year after year; companies trying to perfect handlebar alignment. But what if perfect handlebar alignment wasn’t the answer?

Introducing the left/right bar from REEB Cycles. From the company that brought you a brand name that is Beer spelled backwards, we are bringing you handlebars that are both forward AND backwards.

A handlebar that trains you to think and ride different. Have you crashed in a race and spent countless minutes fumbling around your bum bag for a multi tool to straighten your handlebars? Well after riding these handlebars, fumble no more, handlebar misalignment will never give you troubles again.

Available immediately. No sandy canal will “Ever Given” these bars delay.
Reeb Cycles




Unior Launches Left-Handed Screwdrivers

Views: 2,058    Faves: 1    Comments: 0


Left is the new right.

A problem that has been around since the invention of the screwdriver is now solved – thanks to latest improvement from Unior. Specific left-handed screwdrivers are made for all left-handed people that just couldn’t get the right grip with the standard screwdrivers.





Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson Joins Olly Wilkins on The Lockdown Companion Podcast


Somehow and someway Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson joins Olly Wilkins and Davi for the latest episode of The Lockdown Companion. We get into chatting all things WWE, RedBull Rampage and his secrets to success. There's also a new feature, listener questions, a HUGE giveaway and the usual nonsense...

Stream on all audio platforms including iTunes

The HKT Podcast & The Lockdown Companion episodes are available on iTunes, Spotify, Soundcloud, Stitcher and Youtube. You can even shout at your smart home device and it'll do all the work for you. Don't forget to hit subscribe so you don't miss an episode.

The entire back catalogue can be found on our website and, don't forget to follow us on social media too, it's @thehktpodcast & @odub_23 on everything.

Stay safe and thanks for listening!



PNW Components Launches Range of Bakeable Components to Solve Product Shortages


Well, it seems trite to say it has been a year since last April. No one really could have predicted the challenges, changes, and hardships that have occurred. Lack of bike product has been the main struggle for our team, and we decided after a year of out-of-stock notifications, shipping delays, and product launch push backs that it was time to take things into our own hands (and kitchens). What could our team do with the skills we’ve learned in lockdown to get our customers bike products? One fateful Saturday, while sending each other pics of our latest sourdough creations, it dawned on the team. Bike parts and bread: a match made in Paul Hollywood’s dreams.

Get your components and carbohydrates in one place with the PNW Components Bakeables, made fresh to order in the kitchens of PNW employees. Complete your cockpit with the best-in-class Loaf Lever for smooth dropper actuation, the extra wide, extra thick Baguette Bars for reduced vibrations, and the Garlic Bread Grips so you always have a snack in the palm of your hands.

After nearly a year of out-of-stock notifications shipping setbacks and product launch delays we decided it was time to take things into our own hands and kitchens . Introducing the PNW Components Bakeables a delicious intersection of our love for artisanal bread baking and our passion for mountain biking.

Avoid dings and scratches with the French Bread Frame Protectors, which are easily altered to fit any sized frame.

After nearly a year of out-of-stock notifications shipping setbacks and product launch delays we decided it was time to take things into our own hands and kitchens . Introducing the PNW Components Bakeables a delicious intersection of our love for artisanal bread baking and our passion for mountain biking.

Get your climb on with the doughy Dinner Roll Dropper Post and pair it with some cured meats and cheese for a mid-ride boost of protein.

After nearly a year of out-of-stock notifications shipping setbacks and product launch delays we decided it was time to take things into our own hands and kitchens . Introducing the PNW Components Bakeables a delicious intersection of our love for artisanal bread baking and our passion for mountain biking.

And finally, save your shins and feel particularly grounded with the Pita Pedals.

After nearly a year of out-of-stock notifications shipping setbacks and product launch delays we decided it was time to take things into our own hands and kitchens . Introducing the PNW Components Bakeables a delicious intersection of our love for artisanal bread baking and our passion for mountain biking.

Obviously, we aren’t making bike parts out of bread. And although we are still dealing with stock challenges and shortages, we’re making progress and updating the way we work regularly. Thanks for all the support through 2020 and into 2021. We could not be here without you all.




Tifosi Optics launches Mood Sunnies That Show The World How You Really Feel



bigquotesAt Tifosi Optics, we are always looking for ways to enhance your athletic and sunglass-wearing experience. We’re proud to have brought you innovative technology in our sunglasses for years, such as vented lenses and adjustable ear and nosepieces. But we’re not stopping there! From the same company that brought you scented sunglasses, we’re excited to introduce Mood Sunnies this April 1st, 2021!

These color-changing sunglasses are unlike anything you’ve seen before! Our durable Grilamid TR-90 frames featured in our Swank Series now have the ability to change colors depending on your mood. Gone are the days of only having the Internet to voice your true emotions, now you can slide on a pair of Mood Sunnies and show the world how you really feel.

In an effort to replicate the cutting-edge tech of mood rings from the 1970s, we put our top scientists to work to find a way to allow Tifosi sunglasses to express a variety of moods. That’s where Aura-Enhanced Elements come in! Aura-Enhanced Elements or AEE are liquid crystals that change colors based on the temperature of your forehead’s temples. When the arms of the sunglasses touch your skin, the thermochromic element in AEE uses heat sensors to detect your mood and then changes the frame color accordingly.
Every Swank Series sunglasses in our Mood Sunnies Series start out as a clear “indifferent” frame. Here are just a few of the moods it can change to:

You already knew that sunglasses are one of the best accessories for expressing yourself and now we’ve taken that to another level. So go ahead, grab a pair of Mood Sunnies while you can, they’re only available for today!
Tifosi Optics




Dunbar Cycles Attempts to sell Edible Chamois Cream

bigquotesThe cycling world has been shaken once again after Downhill World Cup Phenom, Fast Eddie, gets caught using a never before seen substance, edible chamois cream.

Dunbar Cycles Team has been leading the Downhill World Cup scene for more than 20 years now, accumulating more than 98 international wins. How many World Cup wins and how many Championships have been affected? Journalist Adam Duckmatter breaks down the scandal surrounding the Vancouver based cycling team.



Dunbar Cycles attempts to sell Edible Chamois Cream to the masses and Fast Eddie poses for the 2017 World's Strongest Man contest




Muc-Off Launches New Deep Scrubber Glove
Muc-Off, the global leaders in bicycle and motorcycle care and maintenance, are proud to launch the Deep Scrubber Glove as an extension to their innovative cleaning armory.

Made from durable and high-strength silicone, the Muc-Off Deep Scrubber Gloves make cleaning tight spots on your hardware easier than ever. The glove has flexible bristles that covers all the fingers as well as the palm, so you can get completely 'hands-on' with your cleaning. The bristles also allow you to tackle hard-to-reach grime, so you can spend less time cleaning and more time riding.

bigquotesI am stoked to add the Deep Scrubber Glove to the line up of innovative cleaning tools. Not many enjoy getting their hands dirty while cleaning, but we are confident this will be an awesome way of doing just that, whilst effectively cleaning your pride and joy!Alex Trimnell, CEO at Muc-Off





Easton Cycling announces STFF - The Easton Supertuck Fine Fund⁠⁠™️
⁠⁠
bigquotesAt Easton Cycling, we believe in the freedom to go fast and ride your bike the way you want. While we applaud rules that improve the safety of riders, we also believe that developing advanced descending skills is a true artform.⁠⁠
⁠⁠
If you have the skills, equipment, and confidence to supertuck we have your back when the longarm of the law comes knocking. The Easton Supertuck Fine Fund™️ exists to cover your in-race supertuck fines as they are handed down from our Swiss overlords. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
To have fines covered, you must fax the following documentation to our dedicated EC STFF line: 1- 937-356-5464. ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
-race registration⁠⁠
-your bib or number plates⁠⁠
-a copy of the infraction and fine itself⁠⁠
-your current exchange rate to Swiss Francs⁠⁠
-a photograph of the infraction in question showing you doing the supertuck in a solo breakaway with at least a 90” lead on the chase group⁠⁠
- a copy of your Strava file (printed)⁠⁠
- a comparative analysis of aerodynamic benefit of your Supertuck versus your standard tuck⁠⁠
- clear documentation of (at least) second level certification in Supertuckvia an established Supertuck instructor ⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Upon receipt of your complete documents, we will invest the total amount of your fine in current fad cryptocurrencies and provide you with an intended payment plan with full payout in 2031, though you may be asked to hold the line by members of Reddit. If you prefer, we can also mail you a road specific dropper post and charge the difference to a credit card of your choice.⁠⁠
⁠⁠
Together we can make the tuck super again.⁠⁠
⁠⁠
**In case you haven’t determined it yet, legal asks we inform you this is a joke. Please do not expect Easton Cycling to pay your Supertuck fines. Hopefully your race winnings can cover those for you.**




Industry Nine Launches N-1 Conversion Service
Reams of credit card statements weighing you down? No more!


Words: Industry Nine

Are outdated geometry, a noodle of a fork, and your antiquated 3x9 drivetrain holding you back from being the envy of all your friends on the trail? Look no further than the Industry Nine N -1 (N MINUS ONE) service - a paradigm-shattering, proprietary bike conversion process. N-1 is designed to transform your current beater to “Pinkbike Staff Ride” approved or conversely, take your new whip and dress it down as your old bike - keeping you out of hot water with your S.O.

Keep your relationship as rosy as the honeymoon phase with our N-1 replication service that hides the fact that your bike truly does now cost more than your car! We’ll even provide tips on off-shore bank accounts and a “Jelly of the Month Club” membership certificate to prove your extra income has been eliminated!

Or perhaps the new bike project is still floundering because of parts availability (sorry!) and you need a kickstart to motivate you into the riding season - we got you covered with our other carefully curated N-1 service options!

The new bike will soon look old, courtesy of N-1.


Not only does N-1 offer bolt for bolt replication, we also offer a variety of subterfuge services intended on punking your riding buddies. Whether it be an exact copy of your older rusty frame, the ubiquitous and indistinguishable “looks like a Session,” or the tax-bracket hopping titanium and carbon laden “Dentist’s Dream,” rest easy with your new (or is it old?) bike in the hands of our overqualified and underpaid team of bikestheticians.


With a dedicated team of engineers, our patent-pending 1:1 N-1 replication technology is proven to evade the eagle eye of even the most perceptive penny-pinching partner. Or mix it up and “de-e” your new e-bike to befuddle your riding buddies as you smoke them up the tech.

Down to the details


Courtesy of our in-house machine shop, hand over your wallet at peace knowing your dollars are spent supporting American-made manufacturing. With a manageable 10-12 month lead time on any conversion service, you’ll be on your new bike just in time for the latest and greatest axle or bottom bracket spec to render your dream build obsolete.

With arms like Popeye, Gabriel, the i9 polisher, has seen every bike from Durango-built Schwinn Homegrowns to AMP Research B2’s



Our only in-class N-1 wheel building table outfits your bike with custom builds designed to withstand the most demanding ride conditions while retaining the look of a 26” wheel with an inner tube and a 1.95” tire.


Another satisfied customer! Anna is “look and look again” bike check ready while keeping her relationship stable, while expanding, yet oddly maintaining equilibrium of her bike stable. For more information visit www.industrynine.com/N-1





Boost Your Instagram Likes With Kona's New Instant Trail Dogs
Olive Buck and Roscoe

SICK OF YOUR BIKING PHOTOS ON INSTAGRAM NOT GETTING ENOUGH LIKES?

You’ve eliminated thigh-gap from all of your riding kits…
You’ve purchased the latest iPhone with portrait mode…
You’re constantly late for work because you insist on shooting at sunrise…
You even purchased a trendy enduro helmet and ultra-fast glasses…
Damn you look good! And, to top it all off, every tool, pump and tube is now attached to your bike with the latest straps and gadgets.

Does it seem like no matter what you try, nothing seems to boost those numbers? Well, we have a scientifically proven solution for you!

INTRODUCING THE ALL-NEW KONA INSTANT TRAIL DOG!

We’ve taken the latest non-Darwinian principles and created a new paper technology we’ve dubbed E40. In its raw form, E40’s molecules flow freely, allowing it to be a soft and flexible paper, but when shaken, they lock together to form a rigid, cardboard-like state. Now, thanks to Kona, you can have all the benefits of dog ownership without any of the poo!

Olive Buck and Roscoe
Olive Buck and Roscoe

Olive Buck and Roscoe
Olive Buck and Roscoe

Kona’s Instant Trail Dog fits in your pocket or trendy-hand-made-hip-pack and simply unfolds trailside to give you all the social media benefits of dog ownership on the spot!

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  The days of low likes are over!

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  Watch your likes and engagement increase by a scientifically proven 400%!

  Currently Available Models: Foldable Lazy Roscoe, Foldable Scrub Olive, Foldable Speed Buck

“Before my foldable trail dog, I had to rely on my real trail dog for attention. He’s great and all, but picking up his poop was stressing me out and making me smell so bad! Now I can just use the foldable Roscoe version and there’s no cleanup! I get great photos and smell awesome! Thanks, Kona Instant Trail Dogs!”

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  Connor Fearon before The Kona Instant Trail Dog

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  Connor Fearon’s results after using The Kona Instant Trail Dog (Speed Buck model).

“Before using my instant foldable trail dog, I was so busy trying to get Fluffy to scrub jumps like a pro. But it turns out a Basset Hound is just not that good at jumping. Or running. Or doing anything quickly. My Kona Foldable Olive makes me feel like I have a real trail dog and gives Fluffy the rest she deserves. No more tired, squatty legs for her. My last photo got 3,141.5 likes! We both win!”

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  Miranda Miller was at her wit’s end before The Kona Instant Trail Dog, she’d tried everything!

Olive Buck and Roscoe
  Miranda Miller will never need to own a real dog now that she’s experienced instant social media results by using The Kona Instant Trail Dog. That Lazy Roscoe model makes her look extra fast!.

Olive Buck and Roscoe
Olive Buck and Roscoe
Kona Instant Trail Dog tester Seb tests out a prototype model.

No more friends with dogs getting way more likes than you on social media!
No more pretending like you’re gonna pick up your dog poo when you really just flick it into the bushes!
No more getting dog hair on absolutely everything!
No more wet dog smell!
No more having to be responsible for another creature’s safety and well-being!


Olive Buck and Roscoe
  We are constantly testing new breeds of dogs for increased engagement. Begbie is trending hard and will be available for purchase in the near future.

Olive Buck and Roscoe

Order your instant trail dog NOW and become the influencer you’ve always dreamed of!




Outbound Lighting Revolutionizes Open-Source COVID-Safe Night Riding Technology

bigquotesFor over a year we have all tried to do our part during the pandemic, which unfortunately means ending almost all our group rides and larger gatherings because there was no reliable way to disinfect our surroundings to prevent the spread. With Outbound Lighting’s new non-patented technology, the group ride is definitively back. By integrating high-energy violot wavelengths into their bike lights, riders can actively disinfect their entire surroundings while riding, virtually eliminating dangerous bacteria and reducing viral content by up to 99.999% in specific circumstances. This proven method of disinfection has been employed in hospitals and airplanes highly effectively already, with almost no-UV exposure by using short-wavelength 401-419nm visible spectrum light that minimizes harmful skin effects like sunburn, while targeting bacteria, fungi, and viruses such as COVID-19.

May seem strange that this is specifically called out as not-patented tech, but that’s actually a deliberate and unprecedented move, as Outbound Lighting is offering it completely open-source to all other bike lighting manufacturers. “We have enough splintering within our own mountain bike communities these days between trail work and eBikes and other user conflicts, Outbound’s goal is first and foremost to get all of us back on our bikes shredding together again in a safe way, rather than trying to squeeze more money out of our customers,” said Outbound’s Product Testing and Stoke Manager, Tom Place. “A lot of our ‘competitors’ are great people and if they can leverage our technology to get us all through this pandemic faster, then we’re all for it, they don’t even need to credit us!”

Find out more at www.outboundlighting.com




116 Comments

  • 296 1
 Kona wins it. Hands down.
  • 2 51
flag Philthy503 (Apr 1, 2021 at 12:40) (Below Threshold)
 These trail dogs are already obsolete thanks to photoshop. Haha, the joke is on Kona.
  • 24 0
 @Pedal-Bin

Yeah man, lots of super original jokes but the Instant trail dog really did it for me, haha!!
  • 5 0
 I am still laughing ant it has been two hours!
  • 2 0
 So damn good!
  • 6 0
 where the link lead to was perrrrfect too haha
  • 1 0
 STOP THIS :LOL:
  • 1 0
 100 %
  • 1 0
 Kona. No contest.
  • 2 2
 YT win simply because that strider bike looks better than 90% of the other real bikes out there.
  • 1 0
 Agree. I’m waiting on a 2-for-1 special to pull the trigger. Family dog is a golden doodle, which is perfect for my OG Hightower. However, would be interested in maybe a purebred herder for my Banshee Titan and probably a pit bull mix rescue for my hardtail.
  • 55 0
 Wouldn't surprise me if Muc Off actually released that glove.
  • 5 0
 I'll buy two Muc Off, just show me how/ where.
  • 16 1
 yeah honestly that was kind of a cool idea
  • 17 0
 I'm waiting until October when they release the Edward Scissorhands version that can clean between cassette cogs.
  • 3 0
 I’d buy it for sure. I have a cotton version that is awesome but hard to get clean. A silicone version would actually be super awesome. And keep your hand dry too.
  • 2 0
 would probably buy
  • 7 0
 And this is how you do free market research....
  • 1 0
 I actually have a pair I use for doing dishes! Not made by Muc Off obviously
  • 1 0
 You can actually buy it off Muc-off
  • 1 0
 They are a real thing BTW ha! muc-off.com/products/scrubber-gloves
  • 35 1
 This should have made the list. Custom colour fork wraps including a kashima coloured one so that you can make your black ano stanchions look like they're fox factory spec!

cyclinic.com.au/blogs/suspension/an-introduction-stanchion-wrap
  • 29 0
 Hurry. ALL SHIMANO 12 SPEED PARTS ARE BACK IN STOCK.
  • 16 0
 Is that 2x 6?
  • 5 0
 @number-6: 3x4, since doubles are sold out as well
  • 1 0
 @number-6: that would be my ultimate setup, maybe 2x7. Faster shifting and cheaper components.
  • 24 0
 Is IFHT's video an April fools joke or a really good ad?
  • 7 0
 a really funny ad
  • 8 0
 A good April fools joke is also a good ad.
  • 1 1
 Even my wife thought it was great. Still won’t let me out for a ride today.
  • 1 0
 They spent some money! Well done. Roasting pharma advertising – so well deserved.
  • 17 0
 Kudos to Nukeproof for inventing g-bikes. It's important to note that gas pedal assist bikes are just bikes.
  • 17 0
 It actually gives you a better workout because you do more laps.
  • 18 0
 Man that Sram GPX was hilarious
  • 5 0
 Still laughing at the galloping action
  • 2 0
 Thank you! Big Grin
  • 14 0
 That full suspension balance bike is probably more practical than a fully carbon balance bike.
  • 9 0
 That Instagram dog is the best ,it might seem as a joke ,but look at the results ,what a nice smart idea ,it might even have a market for big sales (even for a laugh with your friends ,what a world we are now ,that social media is really a joke ,but nice one ,next year almost attacked by a bear,cougar,lion,elephant,:-)))))))
  • 2 0
 Yes, a 47 year old divorced cougar. That’s missing a tooth.
  • 9 0
 The eeWings DIY kit can then be assembled and welded by the rider - at home...
or wherever you have advanced welding equipment.

lol
  • 5 1
 Random bike industry manufacturer: We'r raising our prices because of some specious reasons!
Bikers: ahahah best april's fool prank!!
Random bike industry manufacturer: ain't fooling dude, which kidney do you prefer to give us?
  • 8 0
 I'd like to see the GPX cranks out-takes video! :-D
  • 5 0
 I'll see what I can do
  • 7 0
 It's Kona that really did it for me.
  • 6 0
 Sooo.. you are saying that "Alternative healing kit" was just a joke!??
  • 2 0
 I heard you can actually buy it.
  • 5 0
 I think the biggest joke of the year that not enough people find funny are white mountain bike tires.
  • 2 0
 People who are starting to get bored of the look of their Onzas were really excited when they first saw these.
  • 1 0
 Don't look at my dirt jumper
  • 1 0
 @T4THH: Kenda Boorser Pros?? Just ordered a set Smile Wish they were a bit darker brown.
  • 1 0
 @davemays: my tires are green hahaha
  • 3 1
 Big wow @ Cane Creek, hard to tell if they're just genuinely ignorant about the home mechanic or actually being malicious. Thank god their forks suck and Fox came out with an identical rear shock that a home mechanic can rebuild, otherwise we'd be stuck with their opinion of the people who use their products.
  • 8 3
 There are way too many of these.
  • 6 1
 I want that nukeproof. No joke, that looks fun as hell.
  • 4 0
 I dunno but that Muc Off glove likes like it might actually be pretty good.
  • 1 0
 They're Dish Washing Gloves. Can be had for about $10 USD.
Apparently they're good for cleaning all kinds of stuff and picking up dog hair too.
Going to have to try a pair.

As for the Mood Shades. 1975 is calling and wants its product line back.
  • 1 0
 I bought a smiliar for car washing / dog washing- cost 5€- one of the best things for cleaning your bikes besides a big microfiber cloth.
  • 9 6
 Aaawww. Cane Creek is butthurt because people call them out for not reasonably supporting home mechanics... Aaaand still never buying any of their products because of it.
  • 4 1
 Cane creek: you’re so smart you want to service your own suspension and weld your own cranks?
People: actually we only want one of....
Cane creek: nope you’re too stupid
  • 3 0
 They sell a 50 hr service kit. I get some guys can do it all but I think for most their way of doing things is for the best.

My buddy just became an ext dealer so it doesn’t matter for me anyways.
  • 2 0
 As a left handed person, I can truly appreciate the left handed screwdriver. If they produce more tools, perhaps I can incorporate them into my toolbox and finally feel like I fit in with the mtb community.
  • 4 0
 If only that Nukeproof was called the scouser
  • 3 0
 The original version was, but it got nicked.
  • 4 0
 The Yt and trail dog are pretty good ones.
  • 4 0
 My first bike actually had yellow tyres. Got to love the 80s
  • 4 0
 Seriously though, how can I get the DIY eewings and yellow tires?
  • 1 0
 I think that Versus is actually giving a pair away on vitalmtb Instagram page. I know it’s April 1 but it said it was a real giveaway... *shrug*
  • 1 0
 Check the other site’s IG for a chance to win some yellow tires. We actually made our April Fools joke
  • 4 0
 I want those Deep Scrubber gloves for washing my not-so-instant dog.
  • 2 0
 Nukeproof is really gonna get the e-bike crowd all in their feelings with their April fools joke. *popcorn ready* for these comments.
  • 4 1
 "Instructions are sold separately but are currently unavailable". Best line on the page... Prove me wrong.
  • 1 0
 I was predicting that either Specialized or Yeti were going make an April Fool's announcing an NFT bike due to the current physical bike shortage. Seems like that'll be real news tomorrow.
  • 1 0
 Hello pinkbike user, your mailbox was full, so I'm contacting you here in the comments section. Your bike you ordered is in today and is ready to pick up.

--- Your LBS

(A-F's)
  • 4 0
 I need a trail doggie.
  • 2 0
 I agree. Best one on here this year...the Kona instant trail dog. Thanks @konaworld
  • 1 0
 "Some riders may experience intense childhood wonderment" - me on a bike every time haha gold! This is all too accurate to be an April Fools ad
  • 3 0
 VHS one is worth a watch yall
  • 1 0
 Thanks Smile
  • 2 0
 @VHS: thank you. I got a huge kick out of it. Particularly the old tube bit. Keep on killing that marketing game!
  • 2 0
 Foldable trail dog for the win... If GG actually sold a -10 headset I bet they would sell out
  • 3 0
 Sam Hill, "I just run my cleats really loose".
  • 1 0
 Why is the space adventure shovel so heavy, you can get Ti trowels that weigh half that amount!

dutchwaregear.com/product/deuce-scoop
  • 3 0
 totally wanted those yellow tires....
  • 3 0
 We're doing a giveaway for a set on the "other site's" instagram.
  • 3 0
 @VersusTires: yaaaaas!
  • 1 0
 Just shot water out of my nose reading the eRap electronic axle one Outstanding. With torque sensor
  • 2 0
 Even if it is April’s fools. Don’t give ideas about nee standarts.....
  • 2 0
 is it weird that I actually want that scrubber glove now?
  • 2 0
 If Muc Off doesn't actually release the deep scrubber glove, I will.
  • 1 0
 Not gonna lie, I’d probably buy that Nukeproof before I would buy an e-bike
  • 2 0
 Cool I could use a pair of black sunglasses.....
  • 3 0
 You missed one....
  • 2 0
 Grim baguette tied with instant trail dog.
  • 1 0
 Sam's shoes were turf-riffic!!, but having to mow them weekly is just too much upkeep !
  • 2 0
 do you guys think jb weld will hold together the cane creek cranks
  • 1 0
 Sure! What could possibly go wrong?
  • 1 0
 Roberts electric Axle FTW!
  • 1 0
 Trek ftw Don't try watching at work
  • 1 0
 The Clip-Flop Sandals are for real?
  • 1 0
 Yet another year disappointed by SRAM for not releasing wireless brakes
  • 1 0
 April 1st is a great free marketing day for bike companies on Pinkbike
  • 1 0
 If no one else is gonna eat that pita....
  • 1 0
 Damn,now I want that YT for my kid!!
  • 1 0
 PNW components was my favorite!!
  • 1 0
 Not gonna lie, I'd like to trade my dog in. He's basically a cat.
  • 1 0
 The YT one could be real as it is awesome.... The Kona Trail dog is great
  • 1 0
 Still waiting for the cannondale lefty unicycle...
  • 1 0
 Industry 9 tried way too hard
  • 1 0
 Is it bad that the gxp made kinda some sense in downhill scenarios?hahaha
  • 1 0
 Don't feed wildlife!!!

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