The Fantabulous Loris Vergier Soundboard Uses All the Sounds He Makes During Suspension Set-Up

Aug 16, 2019
by Sarah Moore  


Channel your inner Loris Vergier and tell Jordi Cortes all about your setup woes through meaningful, unambiguous, highly contextual noises using the Loris Vergier Sound Board. Tom Burridge used the commentary provided by Fox from the Dialed video series, with one sneaky extra from Ben Cathro, to create the soundboard.

It's currently up to date with Episode #36 of Dialed and more sounds will be added as the season progresses. What sound did your suspension make on your last ride?


97 Comments

  • 207 1
 Possibly the most important recent development in mountain biking.
  • 11 4
 Tires that grip, tubeless, dropper posts, supple but supportive suspension, 1x, and... the Vergier soundboard.
  • 18 0
 Event coverage be damned, this is the kind of important news that I need an internet connection for.
  • 4 0
 @Garethccc: this is actual suspension data expressed in the language of the Japanese macaque. And a possible new rebound speed measurement standard.
  • 5 0
 This has got to be my favorite thing I have seen on PB so far. Hopefully he does switch to Rockshox next year. They may evaluate the sounds that he makes ans force the timing from 1.42 seconds long to 1.48 seconds long. The you would have to change the whole sound board just to be compatible. LOL
  • 2 0
 @BenPea: Wierd, had a macaque chattering at me when I went to Hokkaido last year... Had no idea he was telling me how to set up my suspension!
  • 3 0
 There's a fine line between genius and madness. This is right on that line lol
  • 67 1
 Ahahaaaa, I love the internet!
  • 2 0
 haha -classic
  • 1 0
 jajajajajaja
  • 53 0
 We need a Rob Warner soundboard!

“That was fawst”
“HES UP!”
“HES DOWN!”
“LOOK AT THE TIME!”
  • 29 0
 "Fast across that camber!"
  • 3 0
 Don't know if this still works cause I'm not using Apple stuff.

apps.apple.com/gb/app/freecaster-mtb-commentary/id441919566
  • 24 0
 Claudio soundboard:
"glad I packed my mud tyres"
"...on the limit but not too far over the limit"
"HAVE YOU SEEN THAT???"
"french lines"
  • 35 0
 "WOW THAT LOOKS FAAAST ! *+3.5* ...uh, no, I thought it looked fast..." :p
  • 22 1
 "This mahn!"
"Surely"

But how will it capture Rob's complete disregard for rounding?

Time: -1.287
Rob: "And he's up by 1.2 seconds now!"
  • 5 0
 And of course "he is keeping good momentum" Big Grin
  • 17 0
 "It's only a matter of time before we see something very special from this man" (rider yard-sales over tape...)
  • 7 0
 I'm mostly sure Rob is still real but I think Claudio died in his accident and has been replaced by an animatronic and soundboard.
  • 21 1
 Rob:
"And here she goes, Rachel Aferton, the woman to beat!"
Claudio:
"Wow, she is looking clean down dere! This is goot!"
  • 10 0
 @mattg95:
"Owowowowowow! That was sketchy!"
"Oh inside line! Let's see if it pays off!"
"She is carrying good speed!"
  • 2 3
 I think you forgot a couple important quotes:

"LOOK AT THE WHIP"
"HOW DOES DANNY HART SIT DOWN WITH BALLS THAT BIG"
  • 2 0
 If I hear Claudio talk about "carrying good speed" again, I'm gonna cack.
  • 2 0
 @endlessblockades: to be fair, he hasn't got worse.
  • 9 0
 @gonecoastal you mean we need the Rob Warner soundboard back! There was an app prob 10 years ago with his best quotes (from when freecaster let him drink during the race). Epic Rob quotes:
“That was uglier than ET with skin cancer!”
“Deadlier than a Spanish cucumber!”
“That was the greatest comeback since Easter Sunday!”
“He’s locked in the hot seat like an Austrian in a basement!”

Miss that app.
  • 2 0
 "THERE'S NOTHING IN IT!!!"
  • 2 0
 "That was unbelievable!"
  • 4 0
 Favorite Rob Warner commentary/quote (about Sam Hill during his race run at the 2009 World Cup Final at Schladming).
"He's on a rampage, like a dog with two dicks, here this afternoon!"
  • 2 0
 In tears laughing at some of the replies in this thread hahaha. Love Warner and Claudio commentary.
  • 3 0
 Every time Marcelo Gutierrez is in the start gate: "he's one of the strongest riders in the field".
  • 36 10
 To all the people who want to say “someone has a lot of time on their hamds”: Screw you!

To the author of this machina grande: I love it! Bravo! Bravo! Slow clap Sir, Slow clap!
  • 17 0
 Yeeenup is my go to rebound setting
  • 16 0
 @jimoxbox: I aim for Yeeenup, but it keeps ending up as ‘eurgh’ or ‘eesh’
  • 15 0
 3 clicks in from wehdehdeh for me
  • 2 0
 @WAKIdesigns There hamds aren't good at much, but once in a while the correct mashing of the keyboard leads to success.
  • 17 0
 Just spent a couple of minutes listening to a frenchman doing weird noises. Totally normal.
  • 18 0
 We need a reaction video with Loris and Loic. Pleeeaaase!
  • 17 1
 Haha awesome...Now we need the Jordi translation app.
  • 39 0
 That would be silent - but involve a lot of eye rolling.
  • 25 0
 @smallsilences: "Cahcahcahcahcah" = 1 click open High Speed Compression?
  • 2 0
 @AntN: has to be!
  • 17 0
 @AntN: wehdehdeh = Pained expression + I just told him I added 1 click rebound but didn’t actually change a thing Smile
  • 2 0
 @AntN: close fork HSR one click?
  • 10 1
 Best. Thing. Ever.
  • 8 0
 Next is a Amaury sound board please.
  • 1 0
 Take my money mate!
  • 4 0
 Honest to god these mechanics must have incredible patience. You've got the language barrier, then you've got the inability of some riders to properly communicate. Always coming back to the tent saying "eh, it sucks." Tune, send them back out, they come back and say "eh, it still sucks." Plllflffttt....
  • 6 0
 Came here to see who still has the Rob Warner app from Freecaster on their phone....
  • 1 0
 I WOULD PAY GOOD MONEY FOR A PHONE WITH THAT STILL INSTALLED
  • 6 0
 now that´s a friday stuff Big Grin
  • 2 0
 This is the first time I realized that I might benefit from a computer with touchscreen. I'm just not quick enough with the touchpad to keep up with the speed he's going at this season.
  • 4 0
 Brilliant. How about a face board for the suspension guy with a game - match the facial response to the Vergier sound.
  • 4 0
 Hahah a yoann barelli soundboard would be awesome too xD I want to see a video reaction from Loris
  • 2 0
 I'm pretty sure that, in actuality, all those soundbites were plagiarized from Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom TV Show......Smile
  • 3 0
 If no one turns up to the Mt St Anne rock garden with a mega phone playing these sounds I'm gonna be sorely disappointed.
  • 3 0
 A magnum opus of sound. Stradivarius who?
  • 3 0
 Pure gold! Good play on saving this for a Friday
  • 1 0
 I know what I'll be doing all weekend between the bad weather and live feeds from Crankworx - youtube voice-over-mashup of one of my trail vids!!
  • 3 0
 Loris, chocolate medal on the podium, but gold medal on internet!
  • 3 0
 I didn't know I needed this in my life until this moment. Beautiful.
  • 2 0
 Been playing like a keyboard for 20 minutes! So hilarious. Cheers to Loris and Jordie and the magnificent idea.
  • 2 0
 I hope I wasn't the only one who played through every single one then realized what I just did
  • 1 0
 Damn, on my version my "Kuh" key doesn't work. I'll have to set the fork to "Kuuh"--a little slower than I like it for most tracks.
  • 3 0
 yeeesssss this is great!
  • 1 0
 Doesn’t work on my phone but tbh Loris with a massive ‘tasche is everything I need..
  • 2 0
 @tobiusmaximum what browser are you using? I wasn't able to test this on many devices but I'll do my best to fix it if I can!
  • 1 0
 @waffleShirt: erm... safari? on an iPhone 7plus
  • 2 0
 @tobiusmaximum: Thanks! I don't own any apple devices but I'll check it out on the virtual device I use for app development and see what the problem might be.
  • 1 0
 @waffleShirt: you are now my favourite developer for not owning any apple devices. I can't count the amount of times people have asked me to fix a problem because their stupid i-device can't communicate with the rest of the world. arrrgg!!!
ok, I feel better now.
  • 2 0
 @rrolly: Don't stop now, the rant train has barely left on its journey to vitriol station.
  • 1 0
 @waffleShirt: vitriol station, aka the Apple store. lol
  • 1 0
 I think my slow coooow may need adjusting and with just a few clicks of Baam baam baam, it might be perfect.
  • 2 1
 Hopefully the area 51 aliens see this and realize how advanced above their level we are as a species
  • 2 0
 Needs keyboard shortcuts!
  • 4 0
 @generationfourth They're on the to-do list with a few other things, hopefully in time for MSA.
  • 4 0
 @waffleShirt: best developer ever
  • 2 0
 Now awaiting someone to mix these into a song!
  • 2 0
 Who needs Rosetta Stone now?
  • 1 0
 So good, and why was Lori's dressed like Freddie Mercury? Nice to hear the old Rob jokes too THIS IS GOLD!! 5 Bagattes!
  • 1 0
 That was supposed to be laughing emoji not question marks, this is hilarious
  • 1 0
 corners smashing sounds are also provided
  • 1 0
 Somebody please post the video fragment with the Arnie sound !
  • 1 0
 @waffleShirt: this made my day, thank you good sir Wink !
  • 1 0
 @Mac1987: You're welcome!
  • 1 0
 Wrong in so many ways, haha I am going to use it everyday.
  • 1 0
 Is freaky friday a new series now!
  • 2 0
 Hilarious!!!Smile
  • 1 0
 this needs a little jack moir in there too
  • 1 0
 The "Kuh" button doesn't work....I want my money back!
  • 3 0
 Your cheque for a picture of my middle finger will arrive in 4 to 6 weeks. In the mean time, I'll see what needs fixing
  • 1 0
 This is effing priceless ????
  • 1 0
 Loris is special
  • 1 0
 For the ringtones!
  • 1 1
 29'' are dead Big Grin

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