Round Up: April Fools Jokes From Around the Cycling Industry

Mar 31, 2022 at 20:58
by Alicia Leggett  
We all need some laughs once in a while. Here are some of the jokes we've spotted from around the bike industry:



Ground Keeper Introduces the Trail Keeper Collection


PRESS RELEASE: Ground Keeper Custom

The art of trail building has long been a coveted art of the mountain bike world, but it consistently suffers in one key area... INNOVATION. That's why we took it upon ourselves to give back to the trail building community through the release of four new products that surely will step up your maintenance routines and show off your style to your closest building buddies. This is the Trail Keeper Collection.


The Beer Keeper and Hand Keepers integrate seamlessly to provide unparalleled comfort and steeze.

We partnered with renowned trail builders, The Shire Crew, to develop a collection of premium trail building accessories. The Lip Keeper ensures jumps last through the harshest winters; a classy step up from your standard painter's tarp. The Hand Keepers prevent pesky callouses while pairing with the Tool Keeper to provide scary precision and grip. Lastly, The Beer Keeper introduces revolutionary technology, preventing decarbonization and making sure you're never called out by your fancy IPA-drinking friends.

The TRAIL KEEPER Collection:

• 4 revolutionary new products
• Space Fern design allows for environment integration
• Customize your trail building experience
• Made in Bellingham, WA
• Bundles start at $69
• Purchase here.



Pembree Announces Ride Concepts Interlock System

Views: 19,873    Faves: 10    Comments: 7


In partnership with Rob Warner, former World Cup DH Winner, and Ride Concepts, PEMBREE are proud to launch the new Interlock System – The biggest advance in flat pedal technology since the traction pin.

After more than 12 months of factory visits and product testing, the patented Interlock system is available, thanks in no small part to a collaboration with Ride Concepts. “The metal membrane in the sole of the shoe created by Ride Concepts has allowed us to revolutionise pin positioning. The results were outstanding and beyond what we expected; A flatter pedal, more security, and it’s faster.” commented PEMBREE Founder, Phil Law.

Rob has always used Flat Pedals so was regarded as the ultimate development partner for this project. “I’ve seen every part of a mountain bike change, but the one thing that hasn’t changed is the flat pedal. That is until now. The Interlock is game changer” – Rob Warner, 1996 World Cup round Winner.

It's like being clipped in, without being clipped in!



Dharco Announces New Reversible Jersey & Underwear


Not sure what colour to wear?
Run out of washing liquid?
Are you a straight-up indecisive human being?
No more.

Behold the 2-Sided Jersey

The Double-Sided Jersey.

Designed with our patented GROSS Technology 'Greatest, Rankest, Overwhelming Sensory System', to cut down on laundry. One jersey, two styles, less washes - winning!
The double-sided jersey is double the style, and double the fun.

Stay tuned as next up, we're working on the Double Sided Undies...both disgusting and awesome.

Double-Sided Underwear




NOBL Launches New HE37 Wheels


Here at NOBL, we’ve been working tirelessly for years to advance carbon rim technology in the pursuit of giving our valued customers every advantage possible when out on the trails. Today, we’re proud to announce our most exceptional product yet, the HE37. These rims share the same profile and specs as our TR37 rims, with one distinct and incredible advantage: They’re infused with Helium.

The brilliant engineers at NOBL HQ have discovered a way to infuse Helium directly into the carbon layup, trapping layer upon layer of this glorious gas between every carbon fiber filament. The results were unbelievable at first, the rims became lighter than air. This new technology will increase acceleration, make climbing easier, improve liveliness on the trail, and is guaranteed to double, or even triple your bunny hop height. The HE37 rims are only available in 32h and feature the same lifetime warranty as the standard TR37 rims.

Give us a shout for more details!

Riders: Paul Berger, Liam Palfrey, Chris McLeod



BikeShow Announces PizzaStow Rack

Views: 3,649    Faves: 1    Comments: 0


PRESS RELEASE

Given our background in family-made bike racks for vans and beyond, the next logical step in our journey led to a second passion: pizza.

The PizzaStow combines all of our experience, technology, and best design innovations into a simple, elegant, and entirely useful rack for your bike-shaped pizza cutter. Finally pizza cutters can be stored or transported safely and securely. Bungee, strap and faff free!


The PizzaStow uses the same patented geometry and 'v'-slider mechanism as our full-size BikeStow Original. This permits compatibility with pizza cutter bikes of different disciplines, including mountain, road, electric, downcountry, and commuter. Since the bike is held by the wheel, there is no risk of scratches or damage to your precious frame and paint.

Impressively, the PizzaStow can also fold completely flat, allowing convenient in-pocket transport for the next time you eat out.

Key features:

• Fully functioning v-sliders and hinge mechanism.
• Folds flat and pocket sized.
• Fits approx. 72-80mm diameter wheels.
• MultiJet Fusion printed, dyed, and shot peened Nylon 12.
• Sensuously tactile finish.
• Family owned & made in the UK.


More details can be found on our website.

Love, the BikeStow family x




VHS Launches "Shush in a Can"


Views: 4,133    Faves: 5    Comments: 0


VHS: Introducing Silent Spray

We are excited to announce the arrival of our latest product "shush in a Can" That's right, we have managed to formulate the perfect combination of silence into compressed air. Safe for any and all use out side of existing VHS products. Spay away any and all sounds from loud bikes to crying babies.

More Details:

• 420 Sprays per can!
• 20 grams
• $19.88 USD
• Two water bottle mounts!
• Safe to use on people (Warning! Effects may last up to 3 days)
• Works on ALL sounds
• Will hide the sound of farts but not the smell (silent but deadly)
• Shut your parents up, can't get grounded if you can't hear them
• Shut your kids up. It's okay you can sleep now
• Get a pay rise! How? "Hey boss, say nothing if you want to give me a pay rise" - Instant success
• Made from 100% recycled sounds
• Endless possibilities
• Special one day price of just sshheven sshhheventy sshheven.

100% Real Reviews

"The best thing since the grim doughnut " - Pinkbike
"AMAZING! Why didn't we think of that?" - WD40
"Better than anything we have done" - Chester Greenwood, creator of ear defenders
"I haven't slept this well in years! Thank you VHS!" - Parents everywhere
"Now we can start working even earlier!" - All local construction

Shhhhh


Kenda's New Kenda Infinity

Kenda Infinity - Predictably Unpredictable

PRESS RELEASE: Kenda

Utilizing our 60 years of heritage and experience in producing bicycle tires we would like to announce the arrival of an all new category of bicycle tire. Aimed at riders looking for that extra unpredictability required for crash avoidance and recovery training.

The Kenda Infinity utilizes Kenda’s all new Variable Tread Pattern technology (VTT) to create a tire like you’ve never seen before. VTT combines the best of Kenda’s tread patterns developed throughout the years into one discontinuous tire tread pattern creating the desired result of washout opportunities at random.

The Kenda Infinity also utilizes another brand new technology from Kenda; Variable Casing Technology (VCT). Like VTT, VCT combines casing structures and characteristics to allow for the desired inconsistencies in stiffness, rollover and ultimate ride feel.

Developed in partnership with some of the top riders in cycling today, the Kenda Infinity fills a segment the community has been pining for but were too afraid to ask. The Kenda Infinity will keep you on your toes and hopefully not on your face.

“Every rider has those “OH CRAP” moments when their wheels slide out from under them, the problem is it’s difficult to train for these moments. With the Kenda Infinity I’ve never felt more uncomfortable on every twist and turn but that is how you grow as a rider, you get out of your comfort zone and your better for it in the end”

-Kenda Sponsored Athlete and Jorts Endorsor Ryan Standish

The All New Kenda Infinity: Predictably Unpredictable

Available April 1st, 2022 at the link below.

https://shop.kendatire.com/product-p/infinity.htm



Rock Machine Bikes Becomes Rock Marine Boats

Press Release: Rock Marine

Bicycle manufacturer Rock Machine is tackling supply chain issues in an unconventional way and entering completely new waters with the Rock Marine brand!

Although it may not seem like it at first glance, the cycling industry has a huge overlap in sharing technology platforms across industries. And it was the advanced technology, in-house development centre and manufacturing capabilities that led to the creation of the new brand - Rock Marine! Fun, durability, affordability, these are the key features of Rock Machine's cycling models. It is no surprise that these factors have become the main pillars of Rock Marine. Another important element in the design of brand new models of boats, is the growing segment of e-bikes, which opens the door to the world of cycling for many people. The electrification in cycling has spilled over into the yacht and boat market.

Key Features


Fun to ride, fun to sail! - "Fun" geometry used in cycling models by Rock Machine was the inspiration for the creation of a completely new and unique hydrodynamic design that allows perfect control at all speeds and will make you smile with every nautical mile.

*

3E Platform - Easy Entry & Exit - Rock Machine's low entry and exit frames are the basis for the same approach to vessel design > patented modular entry platform design allows the boat can be entered without the need for additional assistance.

*

Port Dive - The sail maker - the powerful Port Dive powertrain is based on the Sport Drive version of the electric bike drive system developed by the specialists at Rock Machine Bikes. The Port Dive Ivo2 comes with a lithium polymer battery with a capacity of 1,276 Wh!

Two models:


Rocky_revolution in sustainability!

Robust construction based on natural materials is the basis of this durable boat. The production technology is calculated for maximum sustainability and subsequent recycling. 78% biodegradable materials are used which, thanks to the treatment with the latest version of the nanocoatV3 nano-protective coating, can withstand all weather elements.

Rocky is equipped with the latest type of outdoor skeleton - Stoneshell_VI, which blends perfectly with nature and does not disturb the marine horizon.

Detailed specification:
 Total length (m): 8.7
 Width (m): 2,9
 Draught (m): 0.4
 Weight (kg): 2,400
 Internal height (m): 1.97
 Number of cubicles: 4+2
 CE classification: C
Power unit: the Port Dive evo2 with a lithium polymer battery with a capacity of 1,276 Wh!


Stony_explore the horizons!

Our new type of boat, designed for multi-day cruises, with a solar roof for a feeling of infinity with every payment. Excellent sailing characteristics are combined with a spacious and ergonomic interior. The cork deck is characterized by ample space for safe movement and rest for the crew. The highest quality materials used and the high quality of workmanship are the reason why Rock Marine boats have the ambition to become the most sought-after novelty among demanding customers!

Detailed specification:
 Total length (m): 14
 Width (m): 2,9
 Draught (m): 0.6
 Weight (kg): 2,900
 Internal height (m): 1.97
 Number of cubicles: 6+2
 CE classification: C
Power unit: the Port Dive evo2 with a lithium polymer battery with a capacity of 1,276 Wh!



Guerilla Gravity Re-Launches the GG/DH... as an NFT

GG/DH - Raw

Guerrilla Gravity is excited to relaunch a classic in a Neo-classical world. The GG/DH was GG’s first model and people always comment “when is it coming back???” So here is your chance to own a modern piece of history…

For the re-release the bike has been updated with the most advanced geometry available:


With this setup riders have been able to ride twice as fast, go twice as big, and have 100% less fear, as proven by extensive ride testing in the metaverse.

A small batch run of GG/DHs are available to purchase… as NFTs. One of each classic color is available. So put on your tinfoil sailing cap and head out to the Open Sea for your chance to spend “real” crypto coins on a bike that allows you to ride as fast and go as big as your imagination ever dreamed.

GG/DH - RADiation


#AlloyForLife



The Rise Introduces the ADjustR: World's first Adjustable-Length Crankset

The Rise MTB

Introducing the ADjustR: World's first length adjustable crankset. In an era where number one priority is to achieve optimal performance on all terrains, The Rise came up with a solution that allows you to have the most torque when you need to go uphill, and unmatched stability when it's time to go back down at high speeds.

Equipped with 2 swiss-made Maxon high-torque micro-electric motors, the ADjustR crankset allows you to adjust the length of your crankarms while riding via wireless Di2 technology. By the simple touch of a handlebar-mounted button, adjust the length of both cranks simultaneously to your desired pre-configured lengths to help you get the most of any riding surface. The future is now!



Stanton Reveals Secret Custom Tubing


Revealed - the secret to Stanton's playful feel

If you've ever ridden a frame from UK-based Stanton Bikes you'll know they have a certain X-factor feel. With custom tubing in either steel or titanium, combined with founder Dan Stanton's focus on playful geometry, we create bikes that put a smile on your face with every ride. Today we reveal one of the trade secrets behind the bespoke tubing we specify from our suppliers - the magic ingredient that makes a Stanton feel as though it has fun running right through it.

This high-precision, uniquely-crafted material is exclusive to us and has taken many years of development to get to the product we reveal today. Made from either 3AL-2.5V aerospace-grade titanium, Reynolds or 4130 steel, each piece is crafted for optimal performance and maximum joy.

To see the award-winning bikes we turn these very special tubes into, visit us at www.stantonbikes.com

*DISCLAIMER* Stanton Bikes cannot be held responsible for anyone deciding to cut their frame in half to see if their bike is manufactured from the secret tubing. Trust us - it definitely is. Honest.




Unior Launches the First Smart Tool

The Unior 10mm Smart Socket

Following years of extensive research and development at the Unior Bike Tools Advanced Tooling Division, we are pleased to announce our 1st ever Smart Tool. Having identified the most common and most troublesome problem facing professional mechanics, we set our most senior product managers the following brief. 'Never again will a 10mm socket go missing'.

Using Smart Technology and good old fashioned brain power, we have solved this age old problem once and for all.

Views: 2,037    Faves: 4    Comments: 2


Available for preordering now.

www.uniortools.com



Starling Cycles Bears All In 'Starling Fallacy' Print Journal

Starling Cycles, the UK based steel bike manufacturer, have announced a new 36-page print journal that addresses what they describe as "Starling's deepest, darkest secret".

Said to be "part memoirs and part admission", the book is intended as a means of redemption for brand-owner McEwan.


bigquotesThe Starling Fallacy holds that somehow great geometry and shed manufacturing can overcome the performance issues of a true single-pivot bike. And, since we know that great geometry is free and easily duplicated we can further boil down the fallacy to say that shed manufacturing alone can overcome said issues.

You don’t even have to produce all your bikes in the shed - just some of them. And so, riders who absolutely would not accept the performance of a simple no-linkage true-uni-pivot design from a major manufacturer or even a smaller manufacturer will gush about the descending prowess of a Starling.
Andrew Major, NSMB

Born in the depths of the NSMB forum, the Starling Fallacy is Starling's deepest, darkest secret.

It lurked in wait, exposing the core of the brand's being; its modus operandi; its original sin. But like all secrets, it would never rest, never die, never cease. It would always be there, in the shadows, threatening the heart of Starling Cycles.

And so, Starling Cycles founder Joe McEwan has decided that enough is enough. Like all good internet conspiracies, he knew that the fallacy was based in truth. And so, it’s time to come clean.

The game is up. Starling is no more. Steel and single pivot is not, in fact, real.



The Starling Fallacy - Available To Order Now

To mark the final chapter of Starling Cycles, McEwan has decided to lift the lid on the brand with a limited edition, 36-page, hardback coffee table quality print journal entitled the ‘Starling Fallacy’. Intended as part memoirs and part confession the book will allow McEwan the opportunity to come clean and for, he hopes, redemption.

“Being honest” says McEwan in the opening chapter entitled ‘Got Fired? Fire Up The Welder’ “I just needed a job after I got sacked from my Aerospace gig".

"I’d been mountain biking a couple of times so I thought I’d give it a shot. I wasn’t sure how to make any money from it, but I knew that would come pretty easily”.



Nailed It.

Joe admits that he quickly spotted a gap in the market: “there were frame builders all over the place and it looked pretty easy. You just copy some geometry from another brand and make it a bit longer, lower and slacker. Then you stick a few tubes together and Bob’s your uncle.”

Joe’s enthusiasm wasn’t held back by a lack of resources and, he admits, inspiration was drawn from the world around him. “I only had the shed to work in because the wife wouldn’t let me weld in the house, so I worked in there. I bought a welder from eBay and prayed I wouldn’t blow up the garden. And yeah, I needed a name for the ‘brand’ and was in a rush to get to the pub on a Friday so I just picked the first thing I spotted out of the window, a Starling on the garden fence. Nailed it.”

Joe quickly realised that his new brand had exposed something bigger “They honestly couldn’t get enough of it. It was like people saw the shed, saw how basic the bikes were and were willing to pay double what they would for a proper bike. It was nuts. I jacked the price up after I’d built a couple and the cash just came rolling in.”


My First Million.

Frame design was obviously critical and the chapter of the book entitled 'Mo Pivots, Mo Problems. One Pivot, Mo Money' bears all.

“Kinematics? No idea. I basically just looked at a load of old bikes online and copied those. People seemed to love the idea of a bike with loads of brake jack, disposable shock bushings and suspension that didn’t work when you pulled the stoppers. It was like the more basic you made it, the more they wanted to convince themselves it would work."

"Once I’d made the suspension as absolutely low-tech as I possibly could, I had one final brain wave: ‘What if we make it out of the oldest, heaviest, thinnest, easiest-to-snap material possible?’ Steel was the obvious choice. The internet went bananas for it and I made my first million”.

The Starling Cycles Fallacy - a limited edition coffee table quality print journal

McEwan, currently based in The Bahamas hopes that by sharing his story riders will see the true value of simple, steel, single-pivot bikes and continue to believe the hype. Once sales of the limited edition print journal 'The Starling Fallacy' are complete, he intends to sell the business to a major bicycle manufacturer.

The Starling Fallacy is available to order now at StarlingCycles.com on a strictly limited edition basis.



Industry Nine presents MX'er - A New Cycling App

With everyone jumping into the Private Equity game, we couldn't wait for the opportunity to generate enough cash to partner with a Silicon Valley firm to bring this disruptive match-making technology to the cycling industry. Countless hours of research and development went into the creation of this app and we are stoked to launch this game-changing platform right as the mountain bike world fully embraces mixed wheel sizes.


Introducing MX'er - The cycling app that connects you with singles in your area looking to mix up their wheel size!





We're hoping that the success of this app from all the ad sales and in-app purchases will allow Industry Nine to scale to a place where our Series C investor group will be able to yield maximum returns, allowing our exit to be a Scrooge McDuck-like dive into our money vaults. Our lasting hope is our employees will be able to replace all the old, beat down Tacomas and Subarus in the parking lot with fresh TRD Pros and Outback Wilderness Editions.

For more information head over to Industry Nine's website



Muc-Off Announces Invisibility Jersey



Versus Introduces Bubblegum-Infused Tires



Versus Bicycle Tires is proud to announce our Bubblegum Rubber All-Terrain Tire (BRATT).

Maximizing grip is one of the biggest challenges in making good mountain bike tires. Anyone who's ever stepped on gum in the parking lot knows that it's one of the stickiest things ever... which got us thinking, what if we injected bubblegum into our tire rubber?

"We deployed teams of schoolchildren to help us process the gum, then collected it & mixed it in at the factory," says Versus founder, Scott Hultgren, "the result is amazing, it grips like gum to a desk."


To protect ourselves from child labor laws, we only have a few of these available on the site. We're also giving a set of tires (these or any) to the email list in the month of April, so go to the site to sign up for the email list, check more about our B.R.A.T.T. line or Versus Tires in general.

Harnessing the stickiness of used chewing gum.



Dolly Parton Inspires Kitsbow's Latest Top


Press Release: Kitsbow

Kitsbow is excited to unveil the Tennessee Teal Limited Edition Icon, inspired by the Queen of Country, Dolly Parton.

Offering the fit and function you know and love, but with Dolly-inspired sparkle and shine! This Limited Edition Icon is guaranteed to dazzle those you encounter on the trail, or during your night out on the town!

Chase your dreams, be your own boss, and climb your own ladder with the Tennessee Teal Limited Edition Icon. As Dolly Parton says, “Rhinestones, makeup and hair are fun, but it’s what’s on the inside that makes you a truly special one.” Look good, feel great with this new Iconic Kitsbow Icon.


Features of this new limited edition Icon include:

* genuine rhinestones for nighttime safety
* hater-resistant shoulder panels so dirt and negativity can slide right off
* Cropped length for a honky tonk good time
* Sewn in the USA

Side note: Dolly had nothing to do with the design or creation of this Icon.

Check out Kitsbow's latest Icon introduction here.



Gira Sykkel is Proud to Announce Rip'n'Grip


Press Release: Gira Sykkel

From the creators of last year's GPX, we now have the Rip'n'Grip rider retention system, a groundbreaking technology that lets riders retake control of their passion.

It's been several years of research and testing in collaboration with Fox Racing, Reverse Components, DyedBro, Revel Bikes and Unparalell shoes, but hard work leads to results. This new cross-brand standard is unlike anything seen in the mountain bike scene before, and it allows you to customise your ride, AND the way you ride. Full freedom of contact point placement, and full control once you're wrapped in.

Rip'n'grip will have you breaking KOM's, personal demons and hearts, with new found control, low weight and no sharp edges.



Yoann Barelli's New Modular Hardtail Design




Cyclinic's Take on the Hardtail Conversion


Press Release: Cyclinic

New products come to market all the time, but every now and then something special comes along. Something special that actually has a genuine place in this world, something that has an actual benefit to the real world riders amongst us. We're not talking about the latest suspension gadgetry that makes you ride faster, nor some data acquisition device that tells you how to modify a compression ratio, we're talking about a product that each and every rider can use, whether that be a need or a want. Around the world there is an upwards trend towards longer and slacker hardtails, after years of a marketing push towards a 'bigger is better' mentality, specifically aimed at selling more ever increasingly capable enduro bikes. However, let's face it - They can just suck when the terrain points upwards. The modern hardtail may be the direct answer, however for many of us, a second bike is not always an achievable outcome. This is where 'Huck' comes into play. Huck is a dead-set revolutionary new product that is something you will want to own.

What is it?

Huck (Hardtail Universal Conversion Kit) allows any rider to effortlessly and cost-effectively transform their down country, backcountry, forward country, enduro, e-enduro or e-mtb to a hardtail. Yep, it's that simple, a universal hardtail conversion device that allows any suspension bike from any category to be modified to a climbing machine, a super commuter, or just a snappy pavement belting or kom hunting beast, whatever you're into. User's have also found it to be super helpful when their 'suspension' is away getting serviced, and they have swapped in 'huck' in its place. Some have even reportedly never looked back, selling their freshly serviced shock and enjoying the new found hardtail freedoms that huck brings.

How does it work?

It really is too simple. Huck sits in place of the frame's shock. Ie, remove the shock from the frame, and install Huck in its place, utilizing the frame's existing mounting hardware, and bolts. Huck uses a regular 1/2" eyelet (same as all your common Rockshox, Fox and many other big brands), so you can simply swap out the hardware from the shock, into the eyelets of Huck. Once installed, tighten up the frame's mounting bolts to the frame's torque specification if known (or to the click in your wrist is fine), and get ready to be blown away. That big long travel slug of a bike will now pedal like a hardtail, and will climb like it never should have before. Before you know it, you'll be selling your body armour to make way for more lycra, and entering the next local XC race.


One of the amazing features of Huck is its versatility. There are two models available in its first release, covering the majority of demand. There's a model for Trunnion or standard application, and users can easily change the eye to eye length by using the telescopic function built into the chassis of the Huck device. The Trunnion Huck can be two different lengths (185mm or 205mm), and the standard Huck can be set in 3 different lengths (190mm, 210mm or 230mm). Changing the length to the desired specification is quick and easy, using the 'slick-pin', developed exclusively for Huck, and providing a fast, and secure way to change the length to suit. Slick Pin is a ball-lock style pin that allows for effortless changes in the length of each Huck device. This means that one Huck device can be used across several of the bikes in your shed. Using both your thumbs, you effortlessly depress the ball locking button with one thumb, and drift out the pin with the other. Re-install the pin into your desired hole, making sure the length matches your bike's specification.

Slick Pin:

This video shows how quick and easy it is to make on the fly geometry adjustments. Change the head-tube angle by up to 2 degrees in seconds! Available in both standard and trunnion versions.

Materials:

Tubing: Carbon Fibre Square tubing manufactured to aerospace specification HS-CP-5000
Eyelets: Trunnion Mount and Eyelets manufactured from AL-7055-T77 aerospace grade high strength aluminium alloy.
Slick Pin: Stainless Steel Grade 69
Weight: 100g

Specification / Fitment:

Suitable for any frame with the following shock sizes. (Available in two options)
Trunnion: 185mm or 205mm (Stroke not relevant)
Standard: 190mm, 210mm and 230mm (Stroke not relevant)

Pricing: $USD100.00, $AUD$139.00, $NZD149.00

Available now to order HERE.


User testimonials:

bigquotesAfter sending my shock back for warranty repairs 3 times, I finally decided to sell it on, and replaced it with Huck. I'll never be stressed about a leaking rear shock ever again, not to mention the associated down-time whilst it was away getting repaired. Plus, my big bike is now perfect for commuting.Gerry, Australia

bigquotesThe weight reduction of Huck can really be felt in my full suspension now Hardtail bike. Huck shaved almost 400g from my bike, and I now look for more hills to ride.Vladimir, Russia

bigquotesWhilst Huck has been able to transform the big bike to a climbing weapon, I've also been able to use Huck to slacken my bike's headtube angle by almost 2 degrees, which is amazing for the steep gnar around Queenstown where I live.Greg, New Zealand




We will continue to add to this article as we spot more jokes throughout today.


144 Comments

  • 145 1
 i'd buy a doublesided jersey
  • 46 0
 Agreed!!! That 100% should not be an April fools joke, but a real press release.
  • 24 0
 Probably the worst joke/most viable product
  • 1 0
 "reversible"
  • 4 0
 Sign me up for six
  • 3 0
 I actually own one, made by Vaude 5 years ago...
  • 8 0
 +1. Nothing's worse than showing up at the trailhead and two or more of your buddies are wearing the same color shirt. Like, so embarrassing!
  • 4 0
 All my socks are double sided, not designed that way, I’m just too lazy to turn them right side out from the wash.
  • 2 0
 I want that soooo bad, it looks so cool.
  • 1 0
 I’d go double sided, Febreeze it, flip it, and goooooooooo
  • 1 0
 Totally would buy a couple.
  • 1 0
 @bigtim: *reversible...and thanks for the google link lol
  • 81 2
 Erm, anyone else kind of want bubble gum pink tyres.
  • 5 0
 YESSSS!
  • 4 0
 I seriously think they should make them. ....so get to it!
  • 8 0
 @HardtailHerold @pedalhound @Fix-the-Spade @brooklyn1 - they're real. We're giving a set away this month to someone on the email list.
  • 7 0
 @VersusTires: Please make more 27.5 pink tires! (Or maybe a purple run). $175 ain't cheap for a set of tires but I'm a stupid human who will pay too much for stuff like that, and apparently there are plenty of others since you're sold out. Thank you in advance. There, now you have to do it since I already thanked you.
  • 1 0
 And if anyone would make that happen, it would be versus
  • 2 0
 Halo does pink DJ tyres...
  • 1 0
 @robw515: Yeah, we just priced them kinda randomly figuring we only had a few to sell. Get on the email list, we let them know about stuff like this early & they bought them up in minutes.
  • 1 0
 @VersusTires: My GF would shit unicorns if I could get my hands on these...lol.
  • 63 0
 Helium is a NOBL gas after all.
  • 42 0
 "Bicycle Company Accidentally Unveils Product People Actually Want on April Fool's Day"
  • 13 0
 And just 2 weeks ago we had $1500 flat pedal power meters…the reversible jersey seems an infinitely more realistic product.
  • 38 0
 Kenda Infinity. Finally a tire matches the inconsistency in how most of us really ride. As a commetor on another site said, Kenda needs to add "variable bead technology." That way you never know when you bead will blow off the rim.
  • 3 0
 Yes, kenda really nailed their new downcountry tire
  • 32 0
 People seem to *love* Dolly Parton. (I'm not a country music fan, but she seems like a genuinely decent person. I'm a "fan" based on that alone.) I bet that Kitsbow top would actually sell.
  • 3 0
 My thoughts exactly. They should work with the Queen of Country herself to refine the design.
  • 7 0
 My wife was pissed this wasn't real. That and the pink tires. Some women hate the sparks and pink stereotype, but some women, low and behold, actually love sparkles and pink.
  • 2 0
 @Lokirides: some men as well
  • 29 0
 Pretty sure Tahnee is calling up versus immediately about those pink tires.
  • 50 0
 We've got a set with her name on them. Tahnee, call us. You can even black out the logo.
  • 5 0
 @VersusTires: Just wondering, if I cut the knobs to make the tire a bit faster for my racerun, do they still taste good or did these kids actually get all the taste out of them? Also, when I puncture, can I just chew on the tire to seal it?
  • 6 0
 @vinay: Well, they were pre-chewed by kids so not sure if you'd want to eat knobs, although it is a good idea! Maybe we should do a ClifBar collab next year!
  • 4 0
 @VersusTires: Clif Casing? Walnut side knobs for grip, almond centre tread for speed perhaps? Peanut butter sealant and raisin impact inserts. Tell me where to collect the royalties, or delicious free samples.
  • 3 0
 @grusty92: That's what we're talking about! Probably a little sketch to take breaks with them in bear country but they'd be rad for mid-ride snacks!
  • 27 1
 I know it's a joke, but I would totally buy the trackable 10mm socket. Someone hurry up and make that!
  • 2 0
 This transcends so many hobbies.
  • 20 0
 That Kenda tyre is a pure piece of Art. I'd actually buy one or two if it'd exist...
  • 18 0
 I am totally down with a lot of these and wish they werent jokes
  • 7 0
 Our compatible singles are totally zombie-compatible.
  • 7 0
 Outside Online liquidates company and makes Pinkbike nonprofit. That would have been hilarious
  • 14 0
 These were all great, but the vid from Industry 9 with the adjustable sound hub has been my favorite of all time.
  • 2 0
 O yes. I forgot about that one!. Definitely awsome
  • 5 0
 Thanks Dusty - that was a fun project! .. and we notice the comments and the requests to bring that endcap back.
  • 1 0
 that was great.
  • 10 0
 Farmer John's mtb Park (UK) announced they'd sold up for housing redevelopment, while taking a jab at the pretentious locals. Best one I've seen in years.
  • 10 0
 Starling got me goooooood.
  • 5 0
 Scary thing is, link goes to the shop in their website, it's available at £999.99, you can put it in the basket and calculate shipping... Didn't have the balls to risk that going on my credit card to see if you can actually buy it
  • 16 0
 … by completely ripping the idea off from Andrew on NSMB and giving him no credit. Like a word for word ripoff.
  • 2 5
 @husstler: “ Born in the depths of the NSMB forum”
  • 14 0
 @canned-slammin: it wasn’t born in the depths of anywhere. The concept and my words, word for word, were cribbed from me. I even had to ask Pinkbike, myself, to add my name and attribution to the paragraphs quoted (thank you very much Pinkbike) hours after I contacted Starling.
  • 3 0
 @husstler: thank you.
  • 1 0
 @drewm: My bad, guess I should learn to read
  • 9 0
 I'd buy the PizzaStow with a matching mountain bike pizza cutter!
  • 1 0
 Agreed. I liked that idea. ha ha
  • 4 0
 In all seriousness the Park Tools PZT-2 is fantastic. It does need a rack though.
  • 2 0
 m.pinkbike.com/photo/14520497 my brother made me a carbon bike pizza cutter 5 years ago
  • 1 0
 @SleepingAwake: That is awesome! Ready to shred some dough..
  • 8 0
 Instead of tracking my 10mm socket with Unior, I relabel mine as 1cm. Haven’t lost one yet.
  • 6 1
 Every time someone mentions Starling this will be the first thing that comes to mind. After getting caught plagiarizing a professional writers work they feel no need to make any kind of apology or acknowledgment of what happened but instead just slip a name into the bottom and pretend it never happened. And when caught the “creator” who stole someone else’s work basically said to f*ck off and go complain to Starling.

It’s a small thing in the big scheme, but these situations say a lot about a company and how they do business.
  • 3 2
 Forgetting to attribute Andrew Major in the Starting feature was in fact just a typo. First edit has his name in, for some reason it was changed in press release. A simple error!! We have spoken to him, apologised, he understands and is happy. We will update where we can. No more fury required!!!
  • 2 1
 @phutphutend: I’ll keep an eye on Andrew’s statements concerning the issue. If he’s satisfied I’m satisfied. Last I saw he was not, and seemed to feel he was being blown off.
  • 1 1
 @phutphutend: Didn’t mean that last sentence as a dig or denial of your response, just a statement of fact about what I had seen when I wrote this.
  • 2 2
 @Blackhat: No worries. It was a genuine error on our part. We'll do all we can to remedy and keep Andrew happy...
  • 1 0
 Strange situation, hopefully it was just a typo type situation. But Andrew really did have a good point. People love to talk crap about Orange for being overly simplistic in suspension design. But then you do the exact same thing but make it "homemade" and everyone goes crazy lol. Now I really want to try one of those Starling bikes. Sometimes I wonder if its like 95% placebo and people couldn't even notice the differences in suspension design in a truly blind test.
  • 2 0
 @DylanH93: Not sure it being a 'typo' is realistic - A comment on Instagram suggests that the person who actually wrote / copied the text (marketing guy) for Starling replied to Andrew by saying "Its too bad".

Does that sound like someone who made a 'typo' and forgot to attribute somebody, I don't think so.

Andrew does have a point too - People give Starling much more 'slack' for using the single pivot than Orange where there is a que to say how terrible a single pivot is.
  • 2 0
 Mis-spelling someone's name is a typo. Omitting it entirely is not a typo.
  • 2 0
 @boozed: especially if you basically tell someone to piss off when they raise the issue.
  • 8 0
 Tahnee Seagrave drops current tire sponsor for brand that makes pink tires
  • 7 0
 Ok but I truly want the Dolly Parton Tennessee Teal. "Thanks, it has fringe" is the new "Thanks, it has pockets."
  • 5 0
 Shimano actually made adjustable length BMX cranks as part of their DX series of BMX components in the early 80s. 170 to 180 in 2.5mm increments!
  • 2 0
 Were these on the fly adjustable too? Interesting! I've been thinking about on the fly adjustable cranks too. I had two concepts. One was to work with two four bar parallel linkages (one for each crank) which are then connected through the crank axle. So there would be a concentric axle going through there. The other concept was hydraulic, where the negative chamber of one crank would be connected to the positive chamber of the other crank. Never bothered with actually making prototypes though. They'd both probably break instantly! In the linkage concept, the concentric axle would take quite a beating and even an American BB would probably be too small. The challenge for the hydraulic concept is to make it play-free and to make the cranks torsionally stiff and strong. It would probably require a construction similar to a Lefty fork, but then in such a tiny crank.

I broke another pedal axle last weekend so if even such a simple component can snap, I don't think cranks should be more complex than they are now Wink .
  • 3 0
 Think some of the April fools jokes have tried t be funny but haven’t been. By this is mean, that pizza cutter stand. I’d buy that for my little pizza cutting bike and the adjustable length cranks, maybe not electric powered ones but I could see bike analysis or set up companies using them to identify just the right length crank for a rider, without having to carry a van load of regular ones to try.

As for reversible pants…they been around for years.
  • 6 0
 I feel like Kenda could just re-release the Nevegal and achieve the same result.
  • 3 0
 I think April Fools should be for the whole 24 hours rather than up to noon only. I almost forgot it's April Fools since my day starts at 11:00am!
  • 1 1
 Agreed. This "round-up" is super lame. Hey PinkBike - way to take all the fun out of commenting on individual press releases.

PinkBike party poopers.
  • 13 12
 I'll be the bitter boomer and say it, April Fools has been turned into a regular part of the social media rounds and people are getting a lot less creative and/or funny. These are facebook meme level jokes here. It's funny because april fools stuff is really stuff like Henry Quinney's what didnt happen in the industry articles. It's supposed to be a big dig at yourself or a competitor. Not a "joke" like pink bubblegum tires. Which ultimately looked like a litmus test for the company to see if people would buy a limited edition pink tires (spoiler alert, they absolutely will).

Seeing them all right in a row really took the edge off. An NFT joke? Talk about putting zero effort into a joke. That's literally a free joke in 2022.
  • 5 8
 And you became the Great Decider of What April Fools Actually Is when exactly?
  • 9 2
 @harrybel: I told you I was going to be the bitter boomer.

What did you expect to find down here in the comments? Not... Comments?

Also, just now. Just now I became the grand arbiter of humor. (Frames photo of George Carlin in office) And I'll be taking consultations starting early Monday morning.
  • 2 6
flag SimbaandHiggins (Apr 1, 2022 at 13:52) (Below Threshold)
 Ok boomer
  • 2 2
 @SimbaandHiggins: heheh, now THERES a good joke
  • 1 0
 Thanks @lepigpen , we love you too. The tires are real BTW, we sold what we have in a few mins this am. We would have had a lot more but being the small brand at the factory means you get stuff when they want, not when you want.
  • 1 0
 @VersusTires: Do you guys have any reps with product in Orange County (or even south LA area)? I wanted to put hands on the tires before ordering any since it's online only. I saw Tommy start running them and I'm definitely gonna be in need of tires soon (not pink ones mind you).
  • 3 0
 @harrybel: And you became the great decider of What Opinions You’re Allowed to Share when exactly?
  • 1 0
 @lepigpen: We don't but we are at events pretty frequently. We'll be at Sea Otter next week, then Skypark Bike Fest in May (and probably a couple smaller ones in between). Dreamruns in OC has a few in shop, too!
  • 1 0
 @VersusTires: Alright, awesome. I'll try to make it to SkyPark Fest that's super close to me.

I'm going on a group ride tomorrow in Aliso. I'll keep my eyes out for your rubber.
  • 4 0
 All of this, so rich. Starling gets top billing. Great that so many folks in the MTB world have such a good sense of humor.
  • 1 0
 That was hilarious lmao.
  • 1 0
 @DylanH93:
Yeah NSMB Big Changes paywall introduction is so hilarious!
  • 1 0
 That crank idea might be on the right path ,but vhs thing it will be the best product ever made (except that, SMILEX thing that never went into production,damm you Batman from destroying a dream)and that Velcro thing ,having a professional rider testing that :-))),very well done to all ,but that cranks idea not that much joke
  • 3 0
 Some Aerozine cranks came with a flip pedal eyelet that let you choose between 170 or 175mm lenght.
  • 4 0
 I see the industry is keeping these simple this year
  • 4 0
 This article is a complete joke.
  • 1 0
 Seriously
  • 4 1
 All of these 'jokes' are about as funny as kicking yourself up your own hole
  • 8 5
 Can't belive this isn't behind a paywall
  • 2 0
 If bikes keep getting lower, I'm going to need that ADjustR crankset. True story.
  • 2 0
 They can make the next generation with a sensor so when you lean your bike that side's crank gets shorter.
  • 2 0
 This April Fools day belongs on Saturday Sends, sending it so hard and absolutely jumping the shark.
  • 2 0
 Unior for the win. Hopefully next year they'll add 4 and 5 mm bits for the torque wrench!
  • 2 0
 A better joke for Kenda would've been a tire that actually has traction.......
  • 1 0
 actually.. if you have a really old full susser that you just cannot throw away, but make it into your shopping bike... that HUCK could come in handy... =)
  • 2 1
 If these brands spent as much time, effort & money on their customer care as they do on this april fools bollocks, you'd have a lot more happy customers.
  • 1 0
 Hey @groundkeeper can we get one for those of us that suffer from chamoi rash and are allergic to butter?
  • 4 0
 Anything for you @sikeitsryan. We'll start development ASAP.
  • 1 0
 @alicialeggett You forgot the new GG bike that Yoann Barelli is advertising on Youtube.

youtu.be/jCs4yt_9M2Y
  • 1 0
 I saw that, and started thinking if you could build an adjustable piece to go in place of a shock to change geo. Kind of like a canyon strive except in a hardtail format. Could be a game changer.
  • 2 0
 I don't think Rob Warner knew it was an April Fools!
  • 2 0
 please do not include ours, not a joke product
  • 2 0
 @Pit-Viper: Ours showed up this morning.. already shot our eyes out. Mission Accomplished. Thanks!
  • 2 0
 Would love to ride that Kenda! Crash avoidance training LMAO.
  • 3 0
 Jolanda?
  • 2 0
 can't believe Pink Bike didn't catch her prank. It's better than Goldilocks
  • 1 0
 "The Starling fallacy" f*cking funny stuff, please actually print at least one, for me.
  • 2 0
 shimano has cassette stock ......yah course we believe you
  • 2 0
 The Industry Nine App .......SIZE MATTERS!!
  • 1 0
 Is it bad that I would buy several of these products? I may need therapy. Clearly an addict.
  • 2 0
 Nobody said they will offer cheap bikes that ship within a week?
  • 1 0
 Go check out the great content on BetaMTB…its well worth the paywall……April fools
  • 1 0
 Well slap me with a soggy fish, the Banshee Titan V4 dual shock beast is real.l
  • 1 0
 They are just gauging the interest in the double sided jersey. You watch, it'll come!
  • 1 0
 Actually, 1st April jokes already made it into production. I think of SRAM 28.99mm standard..
  • 2 0
 Kenda's really nailed that downcountry tire
  • 1 0
 Missing the Prevelo NFT kids bike!
  • 2 0
 I love it all!
  • 1 0
 I want those adjustable cranks, those could actually be really good.
  • 1 0
 I love the Shush in a Can (Frost Brewing did it for realz!)
  • 1 0
 I would definitely buy those pink tires
  • 1 0
 But jokes aside. Can someone please make pink tires?!
  • 1 0
 Oh wait....that would be too unbelievable.
  • 1 0
 I would love a double sided jersey. would buy
  • 1 0
 Nosewheeling forbidden in Trentino (Italy): youtu.be/y-Pp3TjquA8
  • 1 0
 Might be worth a quick look at NSMB before it's too late ;-)
  • 1 0
 NSMB paywall is one of the best.
  • 1 0
 Funny. No mention of the NSMB article.
  • 1 0
 Adjustable crank arms are good tho
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