look up in you fork if the fork is new becaus i but on a new fork and did the same thing...you need a star not or spider(same thing)it gos in your steer tube
Well, take it apart. Order should go like this: (from top to bottom, just like in the list)
Top cap Spacer (if needed) Stem Spacer (if needed) Cover tapered ring Bearing Cup (pressed into frame) Frame Cup (pressed into frame) Bearing Cover/seal Crown race.
If it is a non-sealed bearing headset, a bearing can be in upside down. it should turn smoothly with nearly no resistance if its together right.
When you tighten the preload bolt in the top cap, you dont TIGHTEN it. You just loosen the stem bolts, and rock the bike back and forth and tighten it till th eplay goes away, then tighten stem bolts. If you tighten the preload bolt too much you will ruin your bearings.