Bringing Frankenstein to Life

In 2008, my dad bought me my first real mountain bike. It was a brand new Trek 4300. Over the years I have made various small modifications to it. I'm going off to college next year and I will need a bike to take with me. The thought of leaving my custom Trek Rig anywhere other than in my garage locked to the wall filled me with dread, so I decided the 4300 needed to be brought up to speed. This is the short story of the bike's transformation.


This is the bike pretty much stock. This picture was taken spring 2011.





New rubber in late spring 2011. Decided on these tires before deciding on a dedicated mountain bike later in the summer.




I decided in December 2011 that I was going to need a bike for college next year. There is no way in hell that I am taking my custom Trek Rig to college as bike theft is the #1 crime on just about any campus. The only problem is, I enjoy biking too damn much to be held back by a pretty much stock 2008 Trek 4300. Even if I am just biking around campus, I need to capability to shred gnar every time I put my feet on the pedals and grip the handlebars, and quite frankly the 4300 was no longer giving me the riding pleasure that it once had several years ago. It felt heavy, dull, and unresponsive.

What happened next changed my life forever. Ok, well maybe not, but it changed my bike forever. A friend of mine told me about an upcoming swap meet where bikers from all over the greater Baltimore region would be bringing gear to sell and trade to people like me. I was all over the idea. In a few days I had a small list of upgrades for the bike, but priority was a new fork and some smooth tires for urban shredding.

I went into the swap meet with a few hundred dollars, and I was immediately blown away by the range and sheer quantity of products available for purchase. Surely I could find exactly what I needed here. I began looking at forks. Some candidates were a 1992 Rock Shox (don't know what model) in good condition for 20-30 bucks, as well as a 2008 Rock Shox Boxxer World Cup for $400. Fortunately I did not have quite enough for the Boxxer or I would have impulsively bought it and regretted it a few hours later. What I ended up with redefined my entire project.

I rather impulsively bought a sanded down Fox TALAS 90mm-130mm for $150. It had been ridden only a few times and it had upgraded seals for a motorcycle. It was undeniably the steal of the day for me, but i quickly found a few problems. The fork lacked mounts for rim brakes, so discs were the only way to go from here. My new list of upgrades expanded to a hydraulic disc kit (f*ck mechanical discs! Go big or go home.).

I found a never been used Shimano XTR center lock rotor and caliper kit for $55 and I jumped on the offer. The issue was now finding a center lock wheel to accommodate the rotor, and a hose kit and lever which were not included with the caliper and rotor.

In my search for a front wheel, I stumbled upon a Sunrims Rhynolite rim with a Shimano center lock Deore XT hub. I said f*ck it and dropped another $60 on the wheel. Now for the hose kit and lever.

There it was. I still remember the feeling of relief that rushed over me after fruitless searching for the illusive hose kit and lever. A scratched up Hayes lever gleamed in the beam of light blazing through the warehouse window. The hose was draped over a metal pole with a caliper dangling from the other end. "I'll give you 5 bucks for it," I offered. "It's yours man. I didn't expect any takers." The seller assured me that it still worked and that it had been used on his bike for a few years without fail.

The only item that had escaped my grasp so far was a set of smooth tires. This is for one reason only: what the hell kind of bike enthusiast shows up to a swap meet with tires that should be used on a commuter. Everyone knows that people who ride commuters know nothing about bikes! But alas, there was a solution hiding under a fake wood table in a miserable pile of tires. Their smooth center ridge intrigued me. Then I noticed the sculpted sides of the tire. Clearly this was an urban tire, but no mere commuter. What it was was a set of Continental Town and Country tires, and despite the rather tame name, they are the standard tires used on police bikes in many cities. They had the features I was looking for: low rolling resistance, good traction on concrete and asphalt, and good durability. They were in short, the perfect tire, so i bought the set for $40.

A few days later and a few hundred dollars shorter came the big day. INSTALLATION DAY!!! I assembled my 5 mils, screw drivers, pliers, wire cutters, and various park tools, and set to work! For whatever reason I decided working in my bed room was a good idea... Yeah not so much.






After a few minutes, my clean room had been transformed into a messy bike shop. Somehow in all this confusion I managed not to lose a single screw or washer!






Rhynolite/Deore XT/XTR combo assembled it was time to mount the fork.





Fork mounted. Time to remove the shitty Shimano Alivo front derailleur and Tektro rim brakes, and mount the tires and ultimately the front rim.





New fork, new wheel, new tire, no f*cking brake. I needed a bleed kit because apparently Shimano thought it was a good idea to use mineral oil instead of brake fluid. But anyways, here is the progress so far.





Here's a top view, obviously minus the caliper, hose and lever for the front brake.




A couple of weeks later I got a Shimano XTR bleed kit and made a horrible mess of my bathroom. I don't have pics of that, although it was a complete disaster. Just imagine a bathroom with pink mineral oil all over the mirror, floor, and sink, where the tube disconnected under the pressure of me squeezing fluid into the brakes...





Finally was able to install the caliper, hose, and lever. I think it looks pretty good, and it stops extremely well. Props to Shimano. I should also note that I removed the bar ends for a cleaner look. Also, I still don't know what they're used for...





Here is the glorious Hayes lever that I was so very grateful to find. Saved me so much money! I'm incredibly happy that I didn't have to buy a brand new lever and hose from a bike shop for more money than the Sheik of Abu Dhabi has seen in his whole life.





A nice close shot of the Shimano XTR brake kit that is responsible for my oily mirror that I have yet to clean. Still worth every penny though.





Ignore the mud, I'm really proud of this artistic shot of the overkill front wheel.





A close up of the police bike tires. I highly recommend these to anyone looking for a good urban tire.




At this point, I should say that the build is pretty much done. Some key aspects are that I am running it as an 8 speed. I mentioned that I had removed the front shifter for a number of reasons, including the fact that it sucked, and that it was part of the brake lever assembly which i removed. So rear shifter only. The rear of my bike is still pretty much stock, with the exception of the new tires. The front on the other hand is a masterpiece. Some brand names of front components include, Fox suspension, Deore XT hub, XTR brakes, and Rhynolite rims *angelic voices descend from the heavens to sing their praises of this godly creation*.

All of this is fantastic, but there is still one key element missing that is necessary on every custom build. A super f*cking sick jizztastic paint job. Its also worth mentioning that the TALAS was sanded down when I bought it, which was part of the reason I was able to get it so cheap. Fine with me though because now it's gonna be neon! I have a pretty good idea of how the rest of the bike will look as well, but the neon fork is a must.





Here is a very rough sketch of the design so far. I will do final design before I begin the painting process.




I'm gonna take a quick break from Frank (Frankenstein as named by a friend of mine) and give a few quick gnartastic puns, because this is a blog and I can do whatever the f*ck I want on it.

"How would you feel about a one man gnarmy marching on your position?"

"Gnarth Vader uses the force daily to shred."

"King Gnarthur and his knights of the round table all ride Trek X-Calibers."




So the big question is, how does the bike ride? Well... it's different... but not in a bad way. The fact of the matter is that I can't compare it to any bike I've ridden or even heard of because it doesn't ride like anything else out there as far as I know of. When I was picking a category for the bike's photo album, I had a very hard time deciding, because it really is beyond classification.

Let me give you a few insights into the way it rides. The frame and the tires are road bike stiff. There is absolutely no give in either. The fork, on the other hand, is very absorbent and soft. When you sit on the bike, it feels like a mountain bike, because that is basically what it is, although it won't be seeing the trail any time soon. The smooth hard tires are extremely efficient. This alone sets it apart from the standard mountain bike. The on-road grip is admirable, while the off-road grip suffers severely. The front brakes bite hard, but the fork sags under heavy braking and the tail tends to want to break free. As the weight shifts off of the tail, the brakes will lock easily. Luckily, the stock Tektro rear brakes don't provide that much stopping power, so skidding is not the biggest issue. The bike is capable of jumping, although not very forgiving when doing so, due largely to the stiffness of it.

Most of this will be a summary of what I just said, but here are the key points. The bike has the efficiency of a commuter, but they are soft and weak, where this is not. It is stiff like a road bike, with a very forgiving fork. It is durable like a mountain bike, but it isn't suited for off-road use. The one thing this bike can do like no other is shred the concrete jungle.