Top of Pitch Hill, Surrey Hills. It's a mess of trails up here, there are a shit ton all over the place.

 Also, on a clear day you can see the Top Gear test track

 I must get to the Surrey Hills at some point, heard nothing but good things about the riding there! Pretty cool that you can see that track too.

 There are some awesome trails. No real long trails as the hills aren't that big. But loads of them. Plus it's mostly sandy soil so not too bad in the wet.
Where abouts do you live?
If you make the trip there, I'd happily show you around

 Sounds pretty perfect to me. I live in Livingston near Edinburgh so a little bit far away from these hills unfortunately. If it hadn't happened that I moved up here when I was very young, this would be my local since I'm originally from Alice Holt. I will be in Waterlooville for a couple of days in the summer so I'll have discussions with the parents about taking my bike, super unlikely but worth a shot.

 Ahh blimey, miles away then, funky accent an' all

I'm only about 20 mins or so from Waterlooville. Yeah try and bring a bike along. If you can't and fancy a ride, I could probably sort you out with one for a day

 Yeah haha I've grown up with people with funny accents all around and an odd dislike for English too. It's not all bad though, got the Tweed Valley around an hour south and the Highlands an hour north. Also got the Pentland hills 40 minutes rides away. But yes, I will push quite hard to get a bike with me but if not I will definitely let you know and we can see about sorting something out for sure which would be awesome. Would be interesting to be on the other end of a bike loaning situation for a change.